![\"Vintage](\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2015\/03\/blackdog.jpg\")
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This article series is now available as a professionally formatted, distraction-free book to read offline at your leisure. Available as an ebook<\/a> or a paperback<\/a>.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n Everyone loves a good, clear, easily grasped narrative. \u201cX leads to Y.\u201d \u201cA causes B.”<\/p>\n But as we\u2019ve seen over the course of this series, the nature of depression is simply too complex to follow a nice, neat storyline.<\/p>\n In exploring the history of depression<\/a>, we saw that the way we view melancholy today is not how it\u2019s always been seen, and that the condition has in fact been understood in widely different ways over the centuries.<\/p>\n In our discussion on what causes depression<\/a>, we demonstrated that our modern theories are no more clear-cut, and that because melancholy results from the interaction of several different factors, we\u2019ll likely never be able to precisely pin down its origins.<\/p>\n Finally, we saw that there isn\u2019t a bright line that distinguishes \u201cnormal\u201d sadness from clinical depression<\/a>, and that being diagnosed with the latter remains a somewhat subjective call.<\/p>\n Now, as we finish this series, we must challenge two final narratives:<\/p>\n \u201cDepression is entirely the person\u2019s fault. They just need to sack-up and snap out of it.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n \u201cMy depression is not something I can control. I am a victim and there\u2019s nothing I can do about it.\u201d<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n The first narrative is popular amongst those who have never experienced depression; the second amongst those who feel like they\u2019re losing their battle with it.<\/p>\n Each narrative contains a kernel of truth, but each is also grossly simplistic.<\/p>\n Managing one\u2019s depression involves rejecting these easy storylines in favor of navigating a far more nuanced approach between them.<\/p>\n You have to be compassionate but honest with yourself. You have to accept that which you can\u2019t control, and take action on what you can. You have to take depression seriously, without letting its gravity crush you. You have to mitigate its negative effects, while allowing for some positive to come out of it.<\/p>\n Walking this line isn\u2019t easy; sometimes you\u2019ll be too hard on yourself for your failures, and sometimes you\u2019ll wallow in self-pity over the stubbornly melancholic disposition you\u2019ve been handed.<\/p>\n As an aid in your journey, we have provided the following guidebook on how to successfully navigate depression. It\u2019s packed with accessible, research-backed, field-tested action steps, examples from the lives of great men who dealt with depression, answers to frequently asked questions, and even a few tips for the friends and family of the depressed. You\u2019ll learn how to transform your mindset and adopt practices that will allow you to temper depression\u2019s ill effects, harness its more positive attributes, and help you take a more stable, confident stance towards dealing with periods of deep melancholy.<\/p>\n This is not a detailed prescription, but a roadmap. Everyone is different, so what works for you might not work for someone else. I strongly encourage you to experiment and find the practices and habits that are most effective in managing your depression.<\/p>\n Some of what follows reviews important points from previous articles on the general nature of depression. But new insights and angles have been brought to bear on them, and it\u2019s important to read everything in this context of how they practically apply to tackling one\u2019s own melancholy. So I implore you to read this guidebook in its entirety. Do not think of it as a long blog article, but as a short ebook. Take it one section at a time if you need to, but commit to finishing it. I don\u2019t think you\u2019ll find it an unenjoyable read.<\/p>\n With that introduction out of the way, let us now dive into how to take the bull by the horns, and the black dog by the leash.<\/p>\n The obligatory disclaimer: While I have a lush head of hair that would qualify me to play a doctor on a soap opera, I am not a physician, psychologist, or psychiatrist. I\u2019m a guy who went to law school, never took the bar, and blogs about manliness for a living. The recommendations in this article represent the best advice I have culled from the massive amount of research I have done on depression, as well as the practices that have worked for me personally. It should be used for informational purposes only; if you have any concerns, need additional advice, or are suicidal, please talk to a mental health professional. <\/em><\/p>\n Before you get started proactively managing your melancholy, you first need to work on re-shaping your perspective of it, as well as your expectations for what your recovery from depression will look like. Self-defeating beliefs and unrealistic goals can set you up for failure before you even get started.<\/p>\n Understand that depression is natural. Depression has been around for thousands of years, and has been viewed in very different ways over that time. These days we see it as a sickness and disease \u2014 a foreign invader that must be \u201ccured\u201d straightaway. The intentions behind this framework are worthy; by comparing it to a physical malady, little different than something like diabetes, some of the stigma surrounding mental illness is removed. The sufferer cannot be blamed for bringing the condition upon himself.<\/p>\n But this perspective also comes with serious downsides. A disease is something you have no control over; its presence makes you a victim. So too, it makes depression an unmitigated bad, a boogeyman out to destroy your soul.<\/p>\n For these reasons the idea of depression-as-disease can lead to feelings of helplessness and hopelessness. When the black dog arrives at our door, we are sore afraid and sink deeper into feelings of anxiety and despondency.<\/p>\n Better, I think, would be to view depression as something natural, part of the ebb and flow of life. These days we\u2019re expected to be growing and progressing all the time. But the human organism also needs periods of retreat and compression. The frequency for which you need such times of rest and consolidation, and the severity of the consequences when you don\u2019t get enough, is part of what gives you a more or less melancholic temperament.<\/p>\n Your need for periodic retreat is largely due to factors outside your control \u2014 genetics, upbringing, etc. But while we can\u2019t completely control our susceptibility to depression, we can learn thow to manage it \u2014 getting out of funks quicker when we fall into one, taking action to stave off future bouts, and working to mitigate its ill effects while harnessing its positive ones.<\/p>\n In other words, rather than trying to kill the black dog outright, we should try to leash it.<\/p>\n Understand that depression has both drawbacks and benefits.<\/strong><\/p>\n Many of our forebearers, rather than seeing depression as wholly bad, believed that a melancholic disposition was just one of several possible innate temperaments, each with their unique assets and drawbacks.<\/p>\n The downsides of depression are well-known: social withdrawal, a lack of interest in activities, numbed emotions, insomnia, irritability, and so on.<\/p>\n Less talked about are depression\u2019s possible benefits, so let\u2019s explore them:<\/p>\n The ability to accurately assess the world through the lens of \u201cdepressive realism.\u201d <\/em><\/strong>Research shows that melancholic individuals are better at accurately assessing and analyzing their environment, as well as sussing out potential threats. This makes them well-suited for jobs in which a hard-nosed, pessimistic outlook is a boon. A perfect example is the legal field; lawyers need to be able to figure out all the potential downsides, vulnerabilities, and liabilities of deals and cases. I honestly feel that my melancholic temperament helped me succeed in law school. I continue to drive Kate (who has a naturally optimistic disposition) crazy with my insistence on pointing out the possible pitfalls of this or that decision \u2014 an innate impulse that was only heightened by my law school days. But, it really takes both types of people to make the world go.<\/p>\n (As a side note: it\u2019s often quoted that lawyers are statistically more likely to be depressed than non-lawyers — 3.6X more, in fact. This is usually chalked up to the apparently soul-sucking nature of the job. But it also could simply be that people who are already prone to depression, decide to become lawyers.)<\/em><\/p>\n Looking at the world through the lens of \u201cdepressive realism\u201d may contribute to my success in running the Art of Manliness as well. Readers have told me that they appreciate the way AoM steers clear of the kind of pie-in-the-sky, follow-your-bliss, self-help\/lifestyle design messaging that is popular these days, and instead offers more down-to-earth, realistic advice.<\/p>\n Depression lends you a single-minded focus.<\/em><\/strong> Depression drives a person to withdraw socially and break off from their normal activities in order to ruminate on things somewhat obsessively. If the object of that single-minded focus is the person\u2019s gloomy mood, the effect is wholly detrimental. But if a melancholic individual can channel their thoughts towards a purpose outside of themselves \u2014 a public issue that needs tackling, a mathematical equation that needs solving, a novel that needs to be brought to life — they can make significant contributions to the world. Many great men from history, from Charles Darwin to Henry David Thoreau to Winston Churchill, suffered from melancholy, but used it to drive their work and accomplishments.<\/p>\n Depression tends to make you something of an \u201cold soul.\u201d<\/em><\/strong> Those who suffer from depression are inclined to retreat from the world to their home cave, and are thus often more grounded and settled than some of their more flighty peers. Melancholic individuals are also prone to introspection, which produces a depth and seriousness \u2014 a certain gravitas — in them that\u2019s lacking in the perennially sunny. Having suffered acutely, they can gain wisdom and insight on the human condition and may have greater empathy for the struggles of others. Their world-weariness is something people paradoxically feel they can rest in. That is to say, it is often easier to confide in a melancholic man, and trust he may have some advice for you, than it is a hyper-cheery, everything\u2019s-awesome kind of dude, who may not really get why you\u2019re having a hard time, and brushes off your concerns with a shrug and a smile.<\/p>\n This all isn\u2019t to say one type of person is better than another; again, different temperaments have different strengths and weaknesses.<\/p>\n So too, I don\u2019t wish to paint too rosy a picture of a very serious and severe condition that can reach the point of having absolutely no benefits at all. Many artists have harnessed the wisdom-imparting, insight-producing side of melancholy to create some of the greatest paintings and books in our cultural canon. But, some of them also eventually killed themselves.<\/p>\n Even if one\u2019s depressive symptoms don\u2019t drive them to suicide, they can certainly be challenging to deal with. If some people live in a perennial spring, melancholics reside in an eternal winter: it takes more work to get out the door and find activities to enjoy; it\u2019s more difficult to stay in a relaxed and positive state of mind; life just feels harder all around.<\/p>\n Thus, the takeaway here is to accept your melancholic temperament, but to realize it will take hard, intentional work to harness and keep in check. You have to learn to make the most of it, instead of letting it get the best of you.<\/p>\n Manage your expectations about \u201crecovery.\u201d <\/strong><\/p>\n When I had a conversation with psychologist Jonathan Rottenberg, author of The Depths<\/a><\/em>, he mentioned that therapists and doctors don\u2019t manage expectations for recovery very well when dealing with depressed patients. For some reason, a lot of people have this idea that as soon as they begin taking medication or doing therapy, their depression will lift, and it\u2019ll be gone for good. When their recovery doesn\u2019t go as expected, these folks just sink further into a funk.<\/p>\n As someone who\u2019s seen family members deal with depression all my life and has battled the black dog personally, I can tell you that \u201crecovery\u201d from a major episode looks a lot different than the rosy expectations that are often doled out by doctors and drug companies. It\u2019s slow and usually underwhelming. It took me several months before the gray clouds started lifting from my first significant depressive episode. And when the skies did start abating, I didn\u2019t suddenly feel exuberantly happy and positive all the time. I just didn\u2019t feel depressed. Color came back into my life gradually, rather than all at once.<\/p>\n So as you start your journey in leashing your own black dog, keep your expectations reasonable. Don\u2019t expect quick fixes or that you\u2019ll be filled with inexhaustible vim and vigor once your symptoms start decreasing. Having unrealistic hopes will just set you up for a demoralizing disappointment that may spiral you deeper into depression.<\/p>\n Another thing to keep in mind is that even when you get a handle on your depression, you\u2019re still not out of the clear. Research shows that if you\u2019ve experienced one major depressive episode, your chances for another increase.<\/p>\n If you\u2019re someone with a generally melancholic temperament, even when you\u2019re not clinically depressed, then you\u2019re probably more likely to have a relapse down the road. If you\u2019re usually a sunny, optimistic guy, but sunk into a funk because of some life event like the loss of a job or the death of a loved one, your chances of becoming depressed again are likely lower.<\/p>\n Understand that there is no single magic bullet.<\/strong><\/p>\n Another of the problems with our modern pharmaceutical-therapeutic approach towards depression is that various \u201ccures\u201d are often portrayed as \u201cmagic bullets\u201d: \u201cTake this pill and your symptoms of depression will lessen.\u201d \u201cJust a few weeks of therapy will help you start feeling better.\u201d But as we\u2019ve seen, depression is a Hydra-headed beast that is caused by several factors, intermingling in complex ways. Consequently, there\u2019s no silver bullet that will single-handedly stop the monster in its tracks.<\/p>\n Instead, you have to take a holistic, multi-faceted approach that includes shifting your mindset and adopting healthy lifestyle changes. And yes, it may also involve therapy and medication. Everyone is different, so some things will work for you and some things won\u2019t. Be ready to experiment.<\/p>\n Understand that your maintenance program will last indefinitely. <\/strong><\/p>\n Keeping the black dog at bay takes constant practice and effort. There\u2019s no \u201cone and done\u201d here. You have to give focused, intentional <\/em>effort every single day. You\u2019re going to have to be a lot more proactive<\/a> than naturally happy people are about staying on track with your healthy habits. When you\u2019re in the depths of a deep depression, giving that kind of effort can be hard. But you\u2019ve got to do what you can. There\u2019s simply no finish line with depression.<\/p>\n Accept you may never be as chipper as your peers. <\/strong><\/p>\n If you\u2019re a generally upbeat guy who\u2019s suffering a bout of depression, you\u2019ll likely go back to being an upbeat guy once you pull out of your funk.<\/p>\n But if you\u2019ve always been a little gloomy in temperament, even if you get over a hump of clinical depression, you may never be as chipper as some of your peers. While I haven\u2019t suffered a major bout of depression in several years, I\u2019m still not an effusively cheery person. And I never have been. By and large I\u2019m a happy, content, satisfied, stable, grounded, and well-functioning guy. I laugh, joke, and enjoy life. But no one would ever accuse me of having a sunny disposition; lesser waves of melancholy still come and go, and I can be moody, peevish, and curmudgeonly. I don\u2019t think that will ever change. And realizing that has actually made a huge difference in helping me cope with my black dog.<\/p>\n For more than a decade I felt that if I could finally find the right combination of tools\/philosophy\/supplements then I\u2019d magically become a perennial ball of sunshine. That I hadn\u2019t yet been able to accomplish this feat made me feel like a failure.<\/p>\n I finally accepted the fact that there\u2019d never be a time when I could ultimately say I had \u201ccured\u201d or \u201covercome\u201d my depression, and that I\u2019d never be that cheery, upbeat guy. And that was okay; I made peace with my inherently gloomy temperament. While such resignation might seem, well, depressing, continually kicking against the pricks actually made me more miserable. Accepting I was never going to slay the black dog, but rather could only leash him, freed me to concentrate on the far more reasonable goal of mitigating my melancholy. Rather than endlessly looking for new \u201ccures\u201d to try, and flagellating myself that they hadn\u2019t \u201cworked,\u201d I could simply concentrate on making generally healthy practices more of a habit.<\/p>\n I actually became happier by giving up on being happy\u2026at least in the way we currently define it…<\/p>\n Note to the loved ones of a depressed individual<\/strong>: It\u2019s not just important for the depressed to manage their expectations about their condition, but for you to do so as well. If you\u2019re a naturally sunny person, and you use your own temperament as the baseline for normalcy, you\u2019ll be perennially waiting for your loved one to finally \u201covercome\u201d their melancholy and become \u201cnormal\u201d just like you. Each time they fail in doing so will bring you a fresh set of disappointments. You\u2019ll get your hopes up about each new \u201ccure\u201d they try, only to have them dashed. Your frustration may erode your trust and respect for them; \u201cIf they really wanted to change,\u201d you think, \u201cthen they could.\u201d This is surely a recipe for strain in your relationship. Instead, make a deal with your loved one: if they do what\u2019s in their power to manage their depression, you\u2019ll accept that being melancholic is a legitimate, innate temperament that cannot be fundamentally altered.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n Happiness is a word that gets thrown around a lot these days. Seems like there\u2019s always a new blog post or book coming out promising tips on how to attain it. Typically, they talk about \u201chappiness\u201d in terms of \u201cfeeling good\u201d and offer strategies on how you can feel good more often and make those good feelings last.<\/p>\n The problem with this definition of happiness is that its goal is something that is invariably fleeting; feelings and emotions come and go like a summer breeze.<\/p>\n As such, when people, especially those who are not constitutionally cheery, try to be \u201chappy,\u201d they can feel like they\u2019re failing, like they\u2019re trying to catch lighting in a bottle and just can\u2019t get the fluorescently bright feelings to stick around.<\/p>\n Which is why I suggest you swap the modern concept of happiness as \u201cfeeling good\u201d for the definition favored by the ancient Greeks. In antiquity, happiness, or eudaimonia, <\/em>meant living a flourishing<\/em> life. The classicist Edith Hamilton said the Greeks described flourishing as \u201cthe exercise of vital powers along lines of excellence in a life affording them scope.\u201d In layman\u2019s terms, a flourishing life was one in which a person practiced virtue and maximized their potential by striving in worthy pursuits. Happiness was not a flighty feeling, but the sense of satisfaction that comes from reviewing one\u2019s effort each day, week, month, and year. It was for this reason that the Greek sage Solon offered this admonishment: \u201cCount no man happy until the end is known<\/a>.\u201d \u201cHappiness\u201d was a life-long project.<\/p>\n Since it\u2019s not a feeling that comes and goes, happiness-as-flourishing is more concrete and within an individual\u2019s control; even those predisposed to melancholy can achieve it. Flourishing requires you to strive for excellence not only in the big things in life, but also the mundane. Every moment is both a challenge and an opportunity. Within this framework of happiness, it doesn\u2019t matter if you\u2019re not bubbling with enthusiasm, so long as you\u2019re working to be a little bit better in everything you do.<\/p>\n But here\u2019s the interesting thing. As you focus on taking action to be better \u2014 to flourish \u2014 you put yourself in a position to experience more \u201cfeel good\u201d happiness, too. \u201cJoy, like sweat, is usually a byproduct of your activity, not your aim,\u201d writes Eric Greitens in Resilience<\/a>. <\/em><\/p>\n Feel-good happiness won\u2019t come all the time, so don\u2019t expect it to, but enjoy it when it pays a visit. Soak it in. Relish it. But then get back to working on living a life of excellence.<\/p>\n One of the theories as to why women get depressed more often than men is that women have a greater tendency to ruminate about their feelings, which, as we\u2019ll discuss below, actually makes people feel worse rather than better. Men, on the other hand, are more likely to distract themselves from their low moods by engaging in activity. This action-oriented approach alleviates depression more effectively than brooding.<\/p>\n Unfortunately, because women are more likely to suffer from depression, descriptions of its symptoms, as well as proposed cures, have tended to be female-oriented; the focus is on the symptoms of one\u2019s mood and the need to talk it out. And because our whole culture has been influenced by modern psychological theories, even men now frequently see depression through this \u201ctherapeutic\u201d lens.<\/p>\n So part of learning to manage your depression will actually be getting back in touch with your innate disposition to deal with it through action rather than rumination or talking. Certainly, thinking through your issues and talking to others can be healthy\u2026in moderation. But brooding and long conversations won\u2019t ultimately pull you out of a dark place, nor strengthen your defenses against future visits of the black dog.<\/p>\n Instead, the path to leashing your melancholic canine must be paved with action. Not just any action; distracting yourself with alcohol, internet surfing, porn, etc., ignores depression\u2019s root causes and will simply leave you weaker and more vulnerable than before. What\u2019s needed is the intentional pursuit of healthy, vigor-inducing, mood-boosting actions \u2014 filling your life with so much good stuff that melancholy won\u2019t have much space to reside. This is the approach many eminent men in history who wrestled with the black dog took \u2014 often with gusto. For example, William Manchester<\/a> observes of Winston Churchill: \u201cPerhaps, as [his daughter] Mary says, his painting, writing, and manual labor \u2018were sovereign antidotes to the depressive element in his nature.\u2019 If so, never was depression so thoroughly routed by activity and wit.\u201d<\/p>\n (An action-oriented approach will be most effective for women too, by the way, but they may have more of an uphill climb in fighting against their inclination to ruminate.)<\/p>\n These life-restoring actions are to be undertaken not simply when you are in the midst of depression, but when you\u2019re feeling good as well. In fact, they are easiest to adopt when things are copacetic, since depression saps your motivation and drive. By making healthy practices a matter of habit \u2014 and nearly automatic — during your good times, you\u2019ll have already \u201cgreased the groove\u201d and made it more likely you\u2019ll stick with your routine during your low times.<\/p>\n Adopting a healthy, good livin’ lifestyle won’t make you immune to depression. But you’ll live continuously on a higher plane of existence, your bouts of melancholy will come around less often, and they’ll be less deep and paralyzing when they do. You’re far less likely to fall into a dark chasm that takes months to climb out of.<\/p><\/div>\n Making a habit of healthy practices won\u2019t make you immune to bouts of depression; if you\u2019re disposed to it because of genetics or other factors, you\u2019ll always be vulnerable to waves of melancholy. But, it will strengthen your resistance to the black dog, so that he comes around less often, and the low spirits he brings become far less severe. Depression\u2019s effects then become more of a nuisance than a paralyzing, life-sucking force.<\/p>\n When it comes to the many theories as to what causes depression, I personally subscribe to that of evolutionary psychology. The idea is that depression developed as a survival adaption that may have acted something like an early warning system that alerted the sufferer that they weren\u2019t on the right path, that the environment they were in was threatening, or that they needed to change certain detrimental behaviors. A low mood was a signal that one needed a time-out to lay low and analyze the root problems at hand.<\/p>\n Unfortunately, our modern go-go-go market society doesn\u2019t allow for any downtime, nor does it encourage healthy, introspective analysis. You\u2019ve got to keep marching with a rock in your boot, even though it\u2019s making every step painful.<\/p>\n At the same time, our current environment represents an acute mismatch with how we used to live for thousands of years; our isolated, stress-filled, sedentary lives have heightened the negative effects of depression.<\/p>\n Thus, you\u2019re left with two problems: 1) an environment that deepens depression\u2019s shadow side, and 2) a lack of space\/time to utilize depression as intended to figure out where you\u2019re getting off track.<\/p>\n One\u2019s approach to managing depression must then also be dual-pronged and consist of: 1) adopting a lifestyle that hews closer to that of our ancestors and thus mitigates melancholy\u2019s ill effects, and 2) carving out ways to make depression as constructive and generative as possible.<\/p>\n Overcoming Depression\u2019s Catch-22: How do I motivate myself to take action to alleviate my depression, when my depression saps my motivation?<\/strong><\/p>\n One of the most frustrating things about trying to alleviate depression is that it puts you in such a passive state that it makes it difficult to do the very things that will help you alleviate your depression.<\/p>\n That\u2019s why you can\u2019t wait until you \u201cfeel like\u201d taking action before you do it. You just have to do it. Once you take that first baby step, you\u2019ll immediately start to feel just a bit better. That will make you a little more motivated to take more action, and it\u2019ll soon turn into a positive cycle that puts you on the way to mitigating your melancholy. You just have to take that first step.<\/p>\n I know that can be easier said than done, though. One thing that helps me take action whenever I\u2019m in a depressed funk is to break down bigger tasks into smaller, more manageable steps. So if you\u2019re having trouble getting started with meditation, tell yourself, \u201cjust close your eyes for one minute.\u201d That\u2019s much more manageable than trying to get motivated to start a 10-minute session (or longer), so you\u2019ll actually follow through on the impulse. If getting out of bed seems impossible, just focus on moving your toe. After that, move your foot. After that, move your leg, and so on until you\u2019re out of bed.<\/p>\n Another useful tip is to tell someone to nudge you when you start sinking into depressed passivity. For example, as we\u2019ll see below, socializing can help lift our moods, but for most depressed individuals, socializing is the last thing they want to do. So tell a friend, \u201cLook, I\u2019ll probably tell you I don\u2019t want to hang out, but just ignore me and come over. It will do me some good.\u201d<\/p>\n If you\u2019re so severely depressed that the smallest actions seem impossible to undertake, antidepressants may be the thing you need to get going. (See \u201cShould I Take an Antidepressant?\u201d below.)<\/p>\n Ultimately, whether you\u2019re on medication or not, taking the first step to getting better is something you\u2019ll have to just dig down deep and force yourself to do. As Joshua Wolf Shenk, author of Lincoln\u2019s Melancholy<\/a><\/em>, puts it:<\/p>\n \u201cWhen a depressed person gets out of bed, it\u2019s usually not with a sudden insight that life is rich and valuable but out of some creeping sense of duty or instinct for survival. If collapsing is sometimes vital, so is the brute force of will. To William James we owe the insight that, in the absence of real health, we sometimes must act as if<\/em> we are healthy. Buoyed by such discipline and habit, we might achieve actual well-being\u2026In the small battles of life, brushing one\u2019s teeth, taking a walk\u2014these can be movements in preparation for victory.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n Depression is practically non-existent in hunter-gatherer tribes that still live as our forebearers did for thousands of years. They experience the natural emotional ebb and flow of life, including low moods, but the ancient habits they continue to practice have a protective effect that keeps the severest symptoms of the black dog at bay.<\/p>\n You don\u2019t have to reside in a grass hut to enjoy these protective benefits; you just have to live as a 21st<\/sup> century man who honors some of the old ways of his ancestors.<\/p>\n If you implement just one piece of advice from this article, let it be this.<\/p>\n You need to exercise. Regularly. From now until you give up the ghost.<\/p>\n If you struggle with depression, but aren\u2019t regularly working out, you haven\u2019t begun to fight.<\/p>\n This isn\u2019t rah-rah cajoling; it\u2019s a research-backed truth.<\/p>\n Numerous studies<\/a> have proven that exercise is just as effective as antidepressants in treating depression. Research has also shown that people who exercise are about 3X less likely to relapse into depression over the course of a year, than those who take medication alone.<\/p>\n And of course, unlike drugs, exercise is free, and its side effects are 100% positive.<\/p>\n Exercise\u2019s antidepressant effect is thought to be a function of the way in which it boosts endorphins \u2014 a natural painkiller and mood booster. It also increases norepinephrine, a neurotransmitter that may enhance mood. Plus, exercise stimulates the growth of new brain cells, which counteracts depression\u2019s neuron-retarding and brain-shrinking effects.<\/p>\n Exercise also has more intangible benefits \u2014 increasing confidence, discipline, and willpower, and fostering the satisfaction that is born of using one\u2019s body as it was intended \u2014 to move, work, push, run, jump, and lift.<\/p>\n Studies show that the more vigorously you exercise, the more depression-destroying benefits you accrue. Aerobic exercise seems to be particularly effective in boosting mood, but weightlifting has its unique satisfactions as well. I\u2019d recommend doing both. Aim to work out for 45-60 minutes at least 3-5 times a week.<\/p>\n If that seems like too much to implement, know that simply walking vigorously for 45 minutes 3X a week has been found to have depression-squashing effects.<\/p>\n And if you can\u2019t even motivate yourself to start walking? Take a page from a college student who was interviewed for an Atlantic Monthly<\/em> article<\/a> about exercise and depression and adopted the baby steps approach we recommended above:<\/p>\n \u201cHe thought getting some exercise might help, but it was hard to motivate himself to go to the campus gym.<\/p>\n \u2018So what I did is break it down into mini-steps,\u2019 he said. \u2018I would think about just getting to the gym, rather than going for 30 minutes. Once I was at the gym, I would say, \u2018I\u2019m just going to get on the treadmill for five minutes.\u2019<\/p>\n Eventually, he found himself reading novels for long stretches at a time while pedaling away on a stationary bike. Soon, his gym visits became daily. If he skipped one day, his mood would plummet the next.<\/p>\n \u2018It was kind of like a boost,\u2019 he said, recalling how exercise helped him break out of his inertia. \u2018It was a shift in mindset that kind of got me over the hump.\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n When you\u2019re having trouble dragging yourself to the gym, think of the admonition of psychology writer Tal Ben-Shahar: \u201cNot exercising is like taking depressants<\/em>.\u201d If you\u2019ve already got the melancholic deck stacked against you, don\u2019t ingest metaphorical despondency drugs by living a sedentary lifestyle.<\/p>\n When Jack London fell into a deep depression he found his way out through exercise, the love of his wife, and plenty of outdoor activities. Horseback riding, swimming, hiking, diving, biking, sailing, and sleeping under the stars helped him recover from what he dubbed his \u201clong sickness.\u201d He called the city a \u201cman trap\u201d and argued for the necessity of getting “out of Nature that something which we all need, only the most of us don\u2019t know it.\u201d<\/p><\/div>\n If depression is partly caused by a mismatch between how our bodies and minds got used to living for thousands of years, and how we now live in the modern world, then a fundamental step in closing this gap isn\u2019t just moving our bodies, but getting those bodies outside.<\/p>\n Time spent in nature<\/a> centers and calms you. In a study<\/a> done in Japan, researchers found that after a 20-minute walk in the forest, participants had \u201clower concentrations of cortisol, lower pulse rate, lower blood pressure, greater parasympathetic nerve activity, and lower sympathetic nerve activity\u201d than those who spent time in the city instead. In layman\u2019s terms? Walking in the woods mellows you out. In a follow-up study<\/a>, time spent in nature increased feelings of vigor and decreased feelings of anger, anxiety, and depression.<\/p>\n It\u2019s no wonder that mental illness is more prevalent<\/a> in urban areas.<\/p>\n It isn\u2019t just the peaceful, verdant surroundings of the outdoors that lift one\u2019s spirit. Sunshine plays a depression-alleviating role as well. Its vitamin-D-producing rays not only boost mood directly, but also help raise your testosterone levels, which may in turn enhance your mood. During the dark winter months, use a 10,000 LUX light box<\/a> to get the same effect. (Vitamin D supplements can be effective as well.)<\/p>\n You don\u2019t have to go live in a hut in the wilderness to get the depression-alleviating benefits nature provides: do your workout outside; garden; eat your lunch in a park; take a hike; go camping when you can. The mental and physiological effects of a visit to the outdoors have been shown to last for weeks and even months.<\/p>\n Individuals with lower levels of testosterone have been found to have an increased risk for depression. This may partly explain why women are more likely to get depressed than men and why men who undergo testosterone replacement therapy sometimes report a boost in their mood. Scientists believe that testosterone levels<\/a> spur dopamine production, which in turn elevates mood.<\/p>\n While I significantly increased my T levels over the last several years, I can\u2019t say I\u2019ve really noticed a difference in my melancholy. I do feel less \u201ctender\u201d and am less apt to cry when sad things happen.<\/p>\n The mood-boosting effects of increased T may ultimately be most pronounced in those who start out with a clinical deficiency in this hormone. So file this under those things that may not help, but certainly won\u2019t hurt \u2014 especially if you take the all-natural, side-effect-free route to increasing your testosterone<\/a>. Even if boosting your T doesn\u2019t directly make you feel any happier, it may do so indirectly by spurring positive changes in your energy and physique.<\/p>\n If we want to live more like our buoyant, depression-free ancestors, then we would do well to try to replicate the closeness of their communities and take seriously the importance of social ties.<\/p>\n Anthropologists have found that individuals in hunter-gatherer tribes rarely spend time alone; their whole life and identity is intertwined with their kith and kin.<\/p>\n Contrast that with citizens of the modern day. A full quarter of us lack any intimate social connections at all, and many of the rest of us find our bonds meager in number and tenuous in strength. As professor of psychology Stephen Ilardi reports in The Depression Cure<\/a>, <\/em>this isolation leaves us without the kind of relationships that boost resistance to depression:<\/p>\n \u201cThe human species is hard-wired for person-to-person contact, and the supportive presence of loved ones is a powerful signal from the environment that helps keep the brain\u2019s stress response in check. Several studies have shown that people with strong social support networks are relatively unlikely to become depressed. In fact, a British team of researchers found that simply having one supportive confidant \u2014 an emotionally close friend or family member \u2014 cut the risk of depression in half following a painful event like separation, divorce, or job loss.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n Ilardi goes on to note that even having a pet gives a person a sense of connection that curbs depression.<\/p>\n The flip side of the mood-boosting effect of close community is the fact that \u201ctoxic\u201d relationships have the very opposite impact:<\/p>\n \u201cNot all social contact is beneficial\u2026Sometimes, as Sartre complained, \u2018hell is other people.\u2019 Researchers have found, for example, that the presence of a harshly critical, emotionally abusive spouse renders a person more vulnerable to depression \u2014 even more so than if they had no meaningful social connection at all.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n So prioritize the cultivation of healthy relationships, hang out less in networks and more in real communities<\/a>, and cut your ties with toxic people (via negativa<\/em><\/a>!).<\/p>\n Famous melancholics like Churchill and Lincoln found time both for solitary reflection and ample socializing. That may come as a surprise concerning old Abe, as he now seems to us to be the very opposite of gregarious. But the man absolutely loved to be with friends, spinning yarns and telling jokes \u2014 such interactions were a necessary tonic in managing his melancholy.<\/p><\/div>\n Note to the loved ones of a depressed individual<\/strong>: Your friends and family members may withdraw from you when they become depressed. While a little solitude, in certain cases, and when well-directed (more on this below) can be beneficial for the depressed, they also need plenty of social interaction to keep their depression from deepening into something more serious. They won\u2019t ask for this interaction though, and may in fact push back against it. Be persistent and stay in touch anyway. Be willing to do the heavy lifting; rather than asking the person what they want to do, plan an activity they\u2019ll enjoy, and tell them you\u2019ll swing by to pick them up. All they\u2019ve got to do is shuffle out the door.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n Research suggests that what you eat can be connected with depression<\/a>. Individuals who have a poor diet \u2014 high in fried foods, refined carbohydrates, and processed meats — reported more depressive symptoms compared to individuals who maintain a healthier and more balanced diet. But you probably don\u2019t need studies to tell you something you\u2019ve surely noticed yourself: when you eat like crap, you feel like crap.<\/p>\n So ingest the kind of stuff that matches how you want to feel: more natural, whole foods like eggs, meat, veggies and fruits, and less refined and overly processed junk food.<\/p>\n You may also consider intermittent fasting. Research shows that intermittent fasting can help increase mood and alleviate depressive symptoms. In addition to this direct effect, it also increases your willpower and discipline, which can help you take a stronger and more stable stance when grappling with your black dog.<\/p>\n Stay tuned for an in-depth article on intermittent fasting in the next few months.<\/p>\n Even when you\u2019re generally eating healthier, most of us still aren\u2019t perfect and have a hard time getting all the nutrients our bodies need to perform optimally from food alone. This is especially true for things like fatty acids that may play an important role in regulating mood. Supplements can fill the gap \u2014 so experiment to see if they make a difference for you. (If you’re already taking an antidepressant, be sure to talk to your doctor first, as the mix of drugs and supplements can create negative interactions).<\/p>\n Below I\u2019ve outlined a few of the most promising:<\/p>\n Fish oil<\/em><\/strong>.<\/strong> Research<\/a> has shown that regular use of fish oil supplements or other sources of Omega-3 fatty acids may help alleviate depression just as well or even better than antidepressants, but without the negative side effects.<\/p>\n Researchers believe that omega-3 fats assist in neurotransmitter transmission \u2014 particularly with dopamine and serotonin \u2014 as well as reduce inflammation in the brain.<\/p>\n There are two types of molecules that make up omega-3s: DHA and EPA. Depressed individuals usually lack both, but research suggests that EPA is the most potent when it comes to reducing a depressed mood. Studies have found that 1000-2000 milligrams of EPA a day has the best anti-depressive effect. Dr. Ilardi recommends starting with a fish oil supplement that provides 1000 mg of EPA and 500 mg of DHA each day. It\u2019s hard to find fish oil supplements that provide that exact ratio. The one I take is Ultra Strength Rx Omega Factor<\/a>. One soft gel packs 645 mg of EPA and 250mg of DHA, so I take two in the morning to get a total of 1290 mg of EPA and 500 mg of DHA.<\/p>\n One thing to keep in mind with omega-3 supplementation is that it usually takes a few weeks before you\u2019ll notice any improvement; so don\u2019t give it up if you don\u2019t feel any different right away. If you still don\u2019t notice any improvement after a month, you might consider upping your dose so that you\u2019re getting around 2000 mg of EPA a day.<\/p>\n Prebiotics and probiotics<\/em><\/strong>.<\/strong> During the past few years, researchers have discovered that the billions of microbes swimming in our gut and living on our skin have a profound impact on various aspects of our health, including our mood. Research<\/a> has shown that changes in gut bacteria can reduce anxiety in mice, and similar results are being seen in humans. In a study out of England, a group of healthy people were randomly given a prebiotic (carbohydrates that serve as food for your preexistent gut bacteria) or a placebo. The individuals who took the prebiotic paid less attention to negative information and had lower cortisol levels than those who received the placebo. A 2011 study in France found that participants who took a probiotic (strains of good bacteria) for 30 days also had reduced levels of psychological distress.<\/p>\n It should be noted that the connection between gut bacteria and mental health is still inconclusive. Other studies have cast doubt on the effectiveness of pre- or probiotics as a way to alleviate depression. But it can\u2019t hurt to give it a try. To up the amount of good bacteria swimming in your gut, take a prebiotic and probiotic supplement and\/or eat more fermented foods like yogurt, sauerkraut, or kombucha.<\/p>\n My calmness stack<\/em><\/strong>. <\/strong>For the past few years I\u2019ve been taking a nootropic stack<\/a> that\u2019s supposed to help with stress. I picked it up from The Chemistry of Calm<\/a> <\/em>by Dr. Henry Emmons. I\u2019ve had good success with it, and Kate definitely notices when I\u2019ve forgotten to take my supplements!<\/p>\n Those are the supplements I have found to be the most effective in my personal experiments. But there are others Dr. Emmons recommends in The Chemistry of Calm, <\/em>including taurine and L-theanine. As with all this advice, you just have to experiment and see what works for you!<\/p>\n Should I Take an Antidepressant?<\/strong><\/p>\n Ever since the 1980s, antidepressants have become the standard first-line of treatment for individuals complaining about depression. Patients can even get a prescription without visiting a psychiatrist or therapist \u2014 an appointment with the family doctor will do. Today, nearly 40 million Americans take some type of antidepressant, making it the most prescribed pharmaceutical in the United States.<\/p>\n The idea behind antidepressants is that depression can largely be traced to a chemical imbalance in the brain and that medication can restore this balance.<\/p>\n You\u2019d think that with the growing number of Americans getting prescribed antidepressants, there would be plenty of research that shows they work as described and that they\u2019re an effective form of treatment for depression.<\/p>\n You\u2019d think that, but you\u2019d be wrong.<\/p>\n The theory behind selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) — the most common type of antidepressant — is that folks suffering from depression have an inadequate amount of the neurotransmitter serotonin. SSRIs remedy this by blocking the reabsorption of serotonin in the brain, leaving more of the neurotransmitter between the synapses of neurons, which in turn is supposed to lift mood. Yet recent research has shown that serotonin might not actually play that big of a role in causing depression, and that, if anything, it may be that depression sufferers have too much<\/em> serotonin, rather than too little.<\/p>\n This may explain why during the FDA trials for SSRIs back in the 80s and early 90s, they were shown to be only a little better than a placebo in alleviating depression. More precisely, about 40% of trial patients got better by taking a sugar pill, while 50-60% improved by taking an antidepressant.<\/p>\n In 2006, the National Health Institute sponsored a study called STAR*D to evaluate the effectiveness of various depression treatments. Out of 4,000 patients, a little less than 30% experienced remission of depression after taking an SSRI for 14 weeks. During follow-up, many of the patients who did recover after taking an antidepressant relapsed. Several other meta-analyses of studies done on antidepressants have shown similar results \u2014 that they perform about as well as a placebo. Drug companies have even developed drugs that are supposed to boost the efficacy of the drug you\u2019re already taking, if the drug you\u2019re already taking hasn\u2019t been effective.<\/p>\n In addition to the research showing that SSRIs might not work much better than chance, several studies have shown that they cause adverse side effects like weight gain and loss of sexual and even romantic interest in one\u2019s partner (that\u2019s what too much serotonin in the brain can do to you). SSRIs may also blunt a person\u2019s ability to read facial expressions in others. The problem here, of course, is that lack of interest in and problems communicating with one\u2019s partner can cause relationship problems, and relationship problems can push you deeper into depression.<\/p>\n The even more disturbing side effect of SSRIs is the way they increase suicidal thoughts and behavior in children, adolescents, and young adults up to about age 25. Research as to whether these drugs increase suicidal thoughts and behavior in older adults is unclear. Because of these negative side effects, many individuals quit taking antidepressants earlier than their doctor recommended.<\/p>\n Given all of the above, it would be easy to write off antidepressants altogether. But that would ultimately be short-sighted.<\/p>\n While the combined research suggests that antidepressants \u2014 particularly SSRIs \u2014 aren\u2019t very effective in treating depression in most<\/em> <\/em>people, the research does suggest that antidepressants work much better than placebos in individuals who are severely<\/em> depressed (as in they can\u2019t get out of bed and take care of basic life functions). For these individuals, antidepressants can be a godsend; they lift the intense, gray fog long enough to start taking small steps to get their life back on track. And as we\u2019ve discussed, these small steps then often lead to a positive cycle of behaviors that eventually pulls the person out of their dark place.<\/p>\n So, should you take an antidepressant?<\/p>\n Well, it depends. And it\u2019s a conversation you should have with a trained psychiatrist.<\/p>\n The research suggests if you\u2019re feeling mildly depressed, you\u2019d be just as well off taking a placebo. Given the number of possibly negative side effects that accompany antidepressant use, instead of making medication your first line of treatment, try some of the research-backed suggestions outlined in this article. If you still haven\u2019t been able to shake the low mood after a few months of consistent effort, then talk to your doctor about getting on medication.<\/p>\n If you\u2019re severely depressed then definitely consider asking your doctor about taking an antidepressant. Just don\u2019t expect a miracle with it. You may not experience any effects on your mood, and if you do, such effects will likely take at least to 2-4 weeks to become noticeable.<\/p>\n Most importantly, don\u2019t think of your daily pill as a silver bullet for your depression; drugs mark the beginning, rather than the end of depression management. Think of an antidepressant as something that will enable you to get started with making larger lifestyle changes \u2014 the push that will set a long line of dominos in motion.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n Sleep significantly affects our overall physical and mental health, including our mood. If you don\u2019t get enough or if you get way too much, it can heighten your stress and depress your spirits. And the lower and lower your mood gets, the harder and harder it becomes to fall and stay asleep; insomnia is a common side effect of depression. Sleep deprivation and depression can thus turn into a vicious cycle.<\/p>\n But you can take action to help yourself get some better shut-eye<\/a>, which can reverse the direction of that feedback loop. Just don\u2019t get more than about 10 hours a night (on average, for normal adults); like too little sleep, too much sleep can deepen your depression.<\/p>\n There\u2019s a growing amount of research<\/a> showing that mindfulness meditation practiced consistently can be as effective as antidepressants in treating depression, but without medication\u2019s negative side effects. Researchers believe meditation helps keep depression at bay both by reducing activity in the amygdala — the part of your brain that governs the stress response \u2014 and reducing activity in our brain\u2019s default mode network \u2014 an area of the brain that\u2019s linked to feelings of unhappiness.<\/p>\n As we\u2019ll mention below, there\u2019s a whole form of therapy based on meditation called Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy (MBCT) that you might be interested in checking out. But mindfulness meditation is something you can start doing right now on your own<\/a>. It requires very little time — 10 minutes a day will do the trick. A great (and free!) online app to check out is calm.com<\/a>. It provides guided meditations that last 2, 5, 10, 15, or 20 minutes. You\u2019ve got 10 minutes a day. No excuses.<\/p>\n Melancholic individuals tend to be pessimistic about most things in life. And as we\u2019ve discussed previously, viewing life through the lens of \u201cdepressive realism\u201d can be a source of wisdom and insight. But there comes a point when pessimism becomes irrational and counter-productive and just pushes you deeper and deeper into a funk.<\/p>\n People who are prone to depression often have minds that are like Velcro for negative things and Teflon for positive things; that is, they notice everything negative about their lives, while positive things just slip past them. This effect is likely only enhanced by our modern environment and a non-stop news cycle that blares disaster-filled, anxiety-ridden, fear-mongering stories at us 24\/7. After perusing the comment section of YouTube, you could be forgiven for believing human civilization will come to an end by 2020.<\/p>\n One thing that has helped me counteract this Velcro\/Teflon effect and get a handle on my hyper-Eyoreness (besides limiting my news and social media consumption!) is practicing the suggestions made by neuropsychologist Dr. Rick Hanson in his book Hardwiring Happiness<\/a>. <\/em>Whenever you have a positive experience, take 5-10 seconds to really relish it. Enrich the feeling. Let it fully sink into your mind. The positive experiences don\u2019t have to be big — it could be a beautiful sunset, getting a great hug from your kid, or taking the first bite of some magnificent BBQ ribs.<\/p>\n The goal with this exercise is to \u201chardwire\u201d your brain to focus more on the positive and less on the negative \u2014 to reverse the respective positions of your Velcro and Teflon. I\u2019ve been doing it off and on for the past year, and have noticed that I\u2019m much less peevish when I\u2019m consistently making it a habit.<\/p>\n Should I Visit a Therapist?<\/strong><\/p>\n One of the most prominent and popular ways of dealing with depression is undergoing therapy with a psychiatrist or psychologist. Should you take that path? Let\u2019s first give a brief rundown on the options that are out there:<\/p>\n Freudian Psychodynamic Therapy<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy. <\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n As you can see, each type of therapy is about equally effective, and research suggests that the type you choose to use doesn\u2019t ultimately really matter \u2014 just talking to a helping and understanding person on a regular basis is what does the trick. Which type of therapy you decide to do will end up being a matter of preference.<\/p>\n If you do decide to begin therapy, do some homework first. See if you can set up an initial appointment to ask some questions. Inquire about the therapist\u2019s background and training, as well as their experience specifically treating depressed patients. Ask about their approach \u2014 CBT? Psychodynamic? \u2014 as well as their philosophy on medication. You\u2019ll also want to know if they take insurance. Many therapists don\u2019t, and that could make treatment unaffordable for you. (If that\u2019s the case, ask about setting up a payment plan. For lower cost options, look into community health centers or psychologist training clinics at local colleges. If you\u2019re a student yourself, schools often offer free counseling.)<\/p>\n Your primary goal during this initial visit is to see if the doctor seems trustworthy, and just as importantly, if you feel comfortable talking to them. That fact alone can go a long way in your success with therapy.<\/p>\n So, how\/when do you know if therapy is the right choice for you? There are no clear-cut answers, but there are a few things to consider. First, as we\u2019ve seen, all types of therapy are about as effective as antidepressants alone, but, the \u201cside effects\u201d of each kind of treatment are different. Therapy may help you dig into the fundamental origin of your depression and is free of negative neurological\/biological effects. But it will cost you time and money. Antidepressants, on the other hand, are very convenient, but may have deleterious effects on your body and mind, and work by treating depression\u2019s symptoms rather than addressing its potentially deeper roots.<\/p>\n So weigh both sides of the coin.<\/p>\n My advice (and remember, I’m not a doctor) would be to try the suggestions in this article first, and if you don\u2019t find success with them, then decide, based on your personal circumstances, whether therapy or antidepressants would be your best next move. If you think the roots of your depression run deep and are lodged in your upbringing or negative thought patterns, therapy may be the way to go; if you think your depression is more passing and random, then antidepressants might be the route for you. If neither work, then you may ultimately need both!<\/p><\/blockquote>\n It was Churchill who most famously referred to his depression as the “black dog.” While he only fell into one major episode of it, he experienced bouts of melancholy throughout his life. He mitigated its effects through a myriad of hobbies and interests<\/a>. And instead of being a detriment to his goals, he ultimately channeled his melancholy towards accomplishing a greater purpose.<\/p><\/div>\n According to the evolutionary theory of depression, a bout of melancholy was designed to alert the individual to the fact they were potentially on the wrong path or that there were threats in the environment that needed to be addressed. It spurred the sufferer to withdraw and take a time out in which he or she could analyze the situation, ferret out and troubleshoot the issue, and reemerge in a better place than before.<\/p>\n Unfortunately, it\u2019s difficult to take a real time-out in our modern world; gaps in one\u2019s resume are frowned upon; stepping away from some of your responsibilities is read by others as laziness. Within this reality, though, you can carve out some space to utilize depression as it was intended \u2014 to help you understand more about the world, yourself, and how you can become a better man. Here\u2019s how.<\/p>\n Contrary to the popular association of depression with laziness, it can actually arise from trying to do too much<\/em>. Both of my bouts of depression were precipitated by a period of grinding work and an overly packed schedule.<\/p>\n As we\u2019ve been discussing, activity itself is not the problem, and is in fact a central part of the solution. But there\u2019s a difference between taking care of necessary maintenance tasks, and being overwhelmed by plain old \u201cbusy work\u201d<\/a> \u2014 responsibilities that have nothing to do with what\u2019s important in your life, cry out with a false sense of urgency, and make you sick rather than well.<\/p>\n Chronic stress does a number of things to your body and mind that make you vulnerable to depression, and this sets up another of the illness\u2019s catch-22s: you get depressed because you\u2019re stressed, and you can\u2019t alleviate it because you don\u2019t have time to even think about what\u2019s gone wrong.<\/p>\n Thus stress reduction<\/a> could readily fit on either of depression management\u2019s prongs. It strengthens your resistance to the ill effects of the black dog, and, should it arrive anyway, it also opens up time and space in which to reflect on how to deal with it.<\/p>\n The two biggest things that have helped me manage my stress and balance my life are 1) saying \u201cno\u201d<\/a> to avoid over-committing myself, and 2) planning my week<\/a> and days out consistently. As soon as I stop doing those things, I start getting pretty peevish, pretty fast. I have to make sure to maintain some breathing room in my schedule for my mind and body to recuperate.<\/p>\n The more serious your depression, the more you may need to lighten your load to create the time and space to do the important introspective work your depression is prompting you to take care of. While slowing down may make you uncomfortable, realize that it\u2019s only temporary. If you allow your \u201ctime-out\u201d period to strengthen you, you\u2019ll be able to emerge from your funk ready to take on heavier loads of purpose-filled pursuits. It\u2019s preparation for the next phase of your life; if you try to barrel through it, the result may actually permanently cripple you, so that you never reach those future goals. In other words, by taking a short time-out now, and figuring yourself out, you\u2019ll be able to do much more later than had you skipped this phase, burned out, and spiraled into a lower path for your life.<\/p>\n Depression tends to turn your thoughts compulsively inward. This kind of solitary rumination can be beneficial, if you keep it short and focus more on what might be at the root of your melancholy rather than on your feelings themselves. Depression-driven introspection and analysis can help you break down problems and figure out solutions.<\/p>\n But, it\u2019s a process that you have to actively manage, because it has a point of diminishing returns past which it becomes detrimental.<\/p>\n What\u2019s seductive, and potentially destructive, about rumination is the feeling you frequently get in the midst of it that if you just brood a little while longer, you\u2019ll suddenly have an epiphany that explains everything. But if you haven\u2019t gotten an insight after about 10 minutes, you\u2019re probably not going to. To continue to ruminate will likely leave you more depressed than before, for reasons Dr. Ilardi explains:<\/p>\n \u201cThe brain uses our mood state as its single most important memory cue. Believe it or not, the brain tags every one of our memories according to the emotional state we\u2019re in when the event occurs. And whenever we\u2019re in that same mood down the road, this can serve as a powerful retrieval cue.<\/p>\n When you\u2019re sad, for example, that despondent mood starts lighting up all sorts of memories from other moments when you were in similarly low spirits: previous experiences of failure and loneliness and rejection and similar unhappiness.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n In other words, once you start ruminating about how bad you feel and the things you think are wrong with you, your brain starts bringing up past times you brooded over your melancholy and your perceived deficiencies. Which of course just makes you feel even worse. So you figure you\u2019ll ruminate some more to figure out why you\u2019re now feeling really<\/em> bad. And the cycle continues.<\/p>\n Breaking this cycle of despondency means distracting yourself from your thoughts and engaging in an activity that will give the brain something else to chew on. If you can\u2019t seem to will yourself to break away, allow yourself to be responsive to the promptings of another, when they suggest doing or talking about something else.<\/p>\n Note to the loved ones of a depressed individual<\/strong>: It may seem like you\u2019re helping and being compassionate by asking your friend to talk about exactly how they\u2019re feeling. A little of this may be helpful, but it\u2019s more likely to just make them feel worse. Instead, distract them; invite them out to a movie or to go fishing, and talk about other stuff to get their mind off their melancholy.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n One of the best ways to focus your introspective thoughts during a bout of depression is to engage in bibliotherapy — reading books<\/a> about melancholy. Such study will help you understand more about yourself and what you are experiencing.<\/p>\n I\u2019m constantly reading and re-reading books about managing depression and becoming more resilient. I have found this practice enormously beneficial in learning how to accept, manage, and make the most of my melancholy. And I need the regular reminder to \u201chold fast\u201d<\/a> to the best practices I have already implemented and can\u2019t afford to let slip.<\/p>\n Below is a list of the books that I\u2019ve found the most useful:<\/p>\n Besides those books, I think there\u2019s something to be said for reading \u201cmelancholy\u201d literature. It puts your depression into some much-needed perspective. Here are a few favorites of mine:<\/p>\n If depression may be a natural signal from your mind that you need to analyze and address some underlying issues or problems in your life, then journaling<\/a> is an excellent way to structure these sessions.<\/p>\n![\"Vintage](\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/\/2015\/03\/depression-roadmap.jpg\")
<\/p>\nThe Foundation: Change Your Perspective of Depression (and Happiness)<\/span><\/strong><\/h3>\n
![\"Vintage](\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2015\/03\/depresssion-reflct.png\")
<\/p>\nChange Your Mindset on the Nature of Your Depression<\/h3>\n
\n<\/strong><\/p>\nChange Your Mindset About \u201cCuring\u201d Your Depression<\/h3>\n
![\"Vintage](\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/\/2015\/03\/depression-haze.jpg\")
<\/p>\nChange Your Mindset About What It Means to Be Happy<\/h3>\n
![\"Change](\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/\/2015\/03\/depression-happiness.jpg\")
<\/p>\nAn Ongoing, Action-Oriented Approach to Depression<\/span><\/strong><\/h3>\n
![\"Vintage](\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/\/2015\/03\/depression-action-oriented.jpg\")
<\/p>\n![\"The](\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2015\/03\/chartdepression.jpg\")
The Action Steps: A Two-Pronged Strategy for Managing Depression<\/h3>\n
![\"A](\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2015\/03\/depression-action-wrench.jpg\")
<\/p>\n\n
Depression Management Prong #1: Mitigate the Negative Effects of Depression by Reviving the \u201cOld Ways\u201d of Your Ancestors and Making Healthy Lifestyle Changes<\/span><\/h3>\n
![\"Vintage](\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/\/2015\/03\/depression-old-ways.jpg\")
<\/p>\nExercise<\/h3>\n
![\"A](\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2015\/03\/depression-exercise.jpg\")
<\/p>\nSpend Time in Nature and Get Plenty of Sunshine<\/h3>\n
![\"Jack](\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2015\/03\/london.jpg\")
Boost Your Testosterone<\/h3>\n
Take Some Social Medicine<\/h3>\n
![\"Vintage](\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/\/2015\/03\/depression-social.png\")
<\/p>\n![\"Vintage](\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/\/2015\/03\/depression-lincoln-jokes2.jpg\")
Eat Right<\/h3>\n
Experiment With Supplements<\/h3>\n
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Get More Sleep (But Not Too Much)<\/h3>\n
![\"Vintage](\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/\/2015\/03\/depression-sleep.png\")
<\/p>\nMeditate<\/h3>\n
Learn to Soak in the Positive<\/h3>\n
![\"Vintage](\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2015\/03\/depression-soak.jpg\")
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Depression Management Prong #2: Find Ways to Make Depression as Constructive and Generative as Possible<\/span><\/h3>\n
![\"Winston](\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2015\/03\/depresssion-churchill-generative.jpg\")
Reduce Your Stress<\/h3>\n
Focus and Curtail Your Tendency to Ruminate<\/h3>\n
![\"Vintage](\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2015\/03\/depression-ruminate.png\")
<\/p>\nEngage in \u201cBibliotherapy\u201d<\/h3>\n
![\"Vintage](\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/\/2015\/03\/depression-read.png\")
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Writing \u201cPsychoanalysis\u201d (AKA Journaling)<\/h3>\n
![\"Vintage](\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2015\/03\/look-reflect-contemplate-future-2.png\")
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