{"id":37328,"date":"2013-12-11T15:43:21","date_gmt":"2013-12-11T21:43:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/?p=37328"},"modified":"2021-05-30T06:50:49","modified_gmt":"2021-05-30T11:50:49","slug":"new-dad-survival-guide-the-skillset","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/relationships\/fatherhood\/new-dad-survival-guide-the-skillset\/","title":{"rendered":"New Dad Survival Guide: The Skillset"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"New<\/p>\n

When my daughter Scout recently passed the 3-months-old mark, I found myself reflecting on how smoothly adding her into the family has gone. Every newborn brings a certain degree of chaos into your life, but throwing baby #2 into the mix has been surprisingly chill.<\/p>\n

\"Man

Me & a newborn Scouter<\/p><\/div>\n

But oh, ho, ho, was baby #1 a whole different story! When Gus arrived on the scene he turned our formerly childless life upside-down. Charlie at How to Be a Dad jokingly compares the experience of having your first kid to being deployed to Nam and jumping out of a chopper into \u201ca jungle bristling with booby traps of dung-encrusted bamboo stakes.\u201d That about sums it up.<\/p>\n

According to a survey by Esquire Magazine<\/i><\/a>, more than a third of men spend about the same amount of time caring for their kids as their spouse does. That\u2019s how it is around the McKay household and I wouldn\u2019t want it any other way; I love being a really involved, hands-on dad. I know a lot of men in my generation feel similarly; according to that same Esquire<\/i> survey, men ages 18-29 are much more likely to spend as much, or even more time with their kids than their spouses. Yet desire doesn\u2019t always translate immediately into ability.<\/p>\n

For several months after you have your first child, life can feel pretty chaotic. You may have never cared for a baby before, have no idea what you\u2019re doing, and feel majorly stressed and overwhelmed. You want to do the right thing for your kid, but you\u2019re worried you might accidentally kill him.<\/p>\n

There is a lot to fathering that you just have to learn from trial and error. But preparing your mindset and honing your skillset before your progeny arrives can help the experience of being a new dad go more smoothly. So today we\u2019ll talk about the how-tos and tomorrow the preservation of your sanity.<\/p>\n

They don\u2019t hand out an instruction manual in the delivery room<\/a>, but if they did, these two posts will cover what it ought to say.<\/p>\n

New Dad Survival Guide: The Skillset<\/b><\/span><\/h3>\n

With all of the baby-handling tips outlined below, don\u2019t worry so much about hurting your baby. They\u2019re not as fragile as you think. Sturdy little buggers, really.<\/p>\n

Starting Things Off Right: Give Your Baby Skin-to-Skin Contact<\/b><\/h3>\n

\"Newborn<\/p>\n

Leaving the womb and suddenly becoming untethered in the wide, wide world can be a stressful experience for babies. <\/b>Unsurprisingly, studies have shown that holding your baby skin-to-skin can calm and comfort him — stabilizing his heart rate, respiratory rate, and blood pressure, maintaining his body temperature, and decreasing his crying. It also helps you bond with your baby. These benefits occur whether it\u2019s the mother or the father engaging in the skin-to-skin contact. Soon after your baby is born, and for the next few weeks, spend some time with your shirt off, holding him just in his diaper.<\/p>\n

How to Hold a Baby<\/b><\/h3>\n
\"How

Whatever hold you use, the important thing is supporting your baby\u2019s neck, bottom, and small of the back.<\/p><\/div>\n

<\/a><\/p>\n

How to Change a Diaper<\/b><\/h3>\n

\u201cSpread the diaper in the position of the [baseball] diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher\u2019s mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate, and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again.\u201d \u2014Jimmy Piersall, MLB center fielder, on how to diaper a baby<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

A new baby is a poop and pee machine. You\u2019ll be amazed that such a small person can produce so much waste. With a newborn, you can expect to change a diaper every two hours. That\u2019s twelve changes in a single 24-hour day! Wowza! As the baby gets older, the changings will get less frequent, but you\u2019ll still be plowing through a lot of diapers. Unfortunately science has yet to create a self-cleaning baby, so it\u2019s up to you and your wife to clean your little tyke and keep their waste-producing faculties in shipshape condition.<\/p>\n

1. Assess the damage.<\/b> If you smell something funky, you know you need to change your little turd machine\u2019s diaper. When you go to check the damage, be prepared for anything. You might have just a small little nugget waiting for you, or you could have a runny, hazardous waste explosion that has left the confines of the diaper. If it\u2019s the latter, it\u2019s best to move the baby near the bath, so you can thoroughly clean her.
\n<\/b><\/p>\n

2. Get your materials<\/b>. Grab a clean diaper and four or five baby wipes (if it\u2019s #2). Place them to the side.<\/p>\n

3. Put your gas mask on and assume the position.<\/b> If your baby is formula fed, be prepared for a pretty potent smell. If your baby is breastfed, the stink isn\u2019t quite as bad. If you have a boy, it\u2019s always a good idea to juke to the side lest his little sprinkler baptize you into the Church of the Yellow Stream.<\/p>\n

4. Undo the dirty diaper and lift up your baby\u2019s butt.<\/b> Lifting of the tuckus can be done by grabbing your baby\u2019s ankles and gently hoisting her feet into the air. Use a clean part of the dirty diaper to wipe any excess poo from her behind.<\/p>\n

5. Wipe.<\/b> With your baby\u2019s little butt lifted off the ground, grab a baby wipe and start wiping front to back. The front to back motion reduces the chance of spreading bacteria into their privates, which can cause a urinary tract infection (especially important for girls). Make sure you don\u2019t miss a spot. Place the used wipes on top of the soiled diaper. Then, with your baby\u2019s feet still suspended in the air, remove the soiled diaper.<\/p>\n

6. Close the dirty diaper and dispose.<\/b> Fold the diaper on itself with the hazardous waste and used wipes still in it. Use the sticky tabs to make a tight bundle. Place inside a plastic bag, tie the bag off, and hook shot the bundle into the diaper bin.<\/p>\n

7. Pat dry.<\/b> If you want to avoid diaper rashes, make sure your baby\u2019s bottom is nice and dry. Apply some A&D or Desitin if her butt is red or irritated.<\/p>\n

8. Slide the new diaper under your progeny.<\/b> In order for a diaper to function correctly, it needs to be on right. The back of the diaper has the sticky tabs on it. Lay your baby down on this part.<\/p>\n

9. Bring up the front of the diaper and attach the tabs.<\/b> You want it tight enough so that it doesn\u2019t slide off but not so tight it cuts off circulation to your baby\u2019s legs. Most disposable diapers have little ruffles around the leg. Make sure those are sticking out, or you\u2019ll have some leaking problems.<\/p>\n

10. Give your baby a high five. <\/b><\/p>\n

How to Burp a Baby<\/b><\/h3>\n
\"How

With all of these methods, give your baby gentle pats or small, circular rubs to get the burp out.<\/p><\/div>\n

<\/a>
\nBabies get gas from sucking in air whilst feeding. Burping helps them get these air bubbles out. If you\u2019re feeding a baby with a bottle, burp her after every 2-3 ounces she drinks, as well as at the end of her feeding. If she\u2019s fussy or spits up a lot, trying burping even more often during the feeding.<\/p>\n

How to Calm a Crying Baby<\/b><\/h3>\n

The most important skill to have as a new dad (if you wish to maintain your sanity) is being able to calm your baby when she cries.<\/p>\n

Whether your baby cries a lot or a little will largely determine whether your new dad experience seems easier than you thought or a whole lot harder. Unfortunately, whether you get a really happy baby or a cantankerous caterwauler is pretty much a crapshoot. Regardless of the straw you draw, here\u2019s how to soothe their wailing.<\/p>\n

Why is my baby crying?<\/b><\/p>\n

It may seem like your baby is crying as part of some malevolent plot to melt your brain. But usually there\u2019s a reason; remember, when something is bothering her, she doesn\u2019t have any way to communicate besides howling. Therefore, when you\u2019re trying to soothe your scream-machine, it\u2019s helpful to run through a mental checklist of what could be putting a bee in her bonnet:<\/p>\n