![\"Vintage](\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/\/2011\/08\/dad3.jpg\" "\\"dad3\\"")
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You\u2019ve taken care of your wife<\/a> during the last nine months. And you\u2019ve made preparations<\/a> for the baby\u2019s arrival.<\/p>\n And now the moment has arrived at long last: it\u2019s time to bring your progeny into the world. Are you ready?<\/p>\n ___________<\/p>\n For most of human history, the delivery of a baby was an activity strictly relegated to the women\u2019s sphere. Dad was left to pace around outside, waiting for news that his progeny had entered the world and he had officially become a father. His main duty was to hand out cigars to his friends once the nurse bounded through the lobby doors to exclaim, \u201cIt\u2019s a boy\/girl!\u201d<\/p>\n These days, most couples choose to have the father of the baby right by the mother\u2019s side throughout the whole birthing process. Some men (and some women I suppose) likely aren\u2019t that keen on this new responsibility. For me personally, I never would have missed seeing my boy enter the world for the first time and take his first breaths. That\u2019s an amazing moment that I\u2019m very glad is no longer privy to only the ladies.<\/p>\n Just because it\u2019s a relatively new manly role, doesn\u2019t mean you can\u2019t ace it. Here\u2019s how to navigate this only-a-few-times-in-a lifetime responsibility.<\/p>\n Note: This post is given from my experience being the husband of a wife who chose to have an epidural and give birth in a hospital. If your wife is going the natural and\/or home birth route, your experience will be different and more intense, and you should attend a childbirth class to prepare yourself.<\/em><\/p>\n Also, I know that the word \u201cepidural\u201d sends shivers down some of your non-anesthetized spines. But this post is not the place to debate birthing choices\u2014there are a thousand mommy blogs out there where you are welcome to hash it out. Every couple should do their research and decide what’s best for them and their baby. Bug Out Bags<\/a> are for crisis situations like earthquakes, hurricanes\u2026 and when your wife goes into labor and needs you to take her to the hospital. When the moment comes, don\u2019t be rushing around trying to pack a bunch of things like a headless chicken. Have your bag ready to go, so all you need to do is grab it and head out the door.<\/p>\n What should you pack in a Baby Bug Out Bag?<\/p>\n Once you get to the hospital, your role becomes that of coach and support for your wife as she goes through what can be a nerve-racking process. Here are your roles.<\/p>\n Interference-runner.<\/strong> Befitting her personality, Kate took a very \u201ceh, whatever\u201d approach to how the birth was going to happen, but I know some moms draw up birth plans that specify their preferences pertaining to the medications they will receive, how the birth will happen, and what will happen to the baby after he\u2019s born. If your wife has one of these birth plans, make sure the nurses and doctors are aware of it, and run interference between your wife and the people in scrubs. Don\u2019t get in their way, but if they\u2019re about to do something, you can ask what\u2019s happening, and if it\u2019s really medically necessary. If it’s not, push back and ask that they follow the birth plan. Your wife shouldn\u2019t have to be the one who needs to stay on top of everything.<\/p>\n Hand-holder.<\/strong> If your wife gets an epidural, then birth will little resemble the sweating, panting, screaming clich\u00e9 you\u2019ve seen countless times in movies. There\u2019s really not much for you to do. If all goes smoothly, over the course of hours she will dilate, the doctor will decide it\u2019s time for her to push, and out will come the baby. During this time, your job is to be the rock. The calm, confident, hand-holder, who\u2019s there with a reassuring look and word.<\/p>\n Be sure to be flexible and roll with the punches–because things do not<\/em> always go smoothly. You may get a textbook birth where everything progresses right on schedule. Or you may get a birth where all of your best laid plans go awry. Remain levelheaded no matter what happens.<\/p>\n Leg-holder.<\/strong> When the time for pushing comes, the doctor may have you hold one of your wife\u2019s legs up and out. Let the doctor and nurses do most of the coaching on when to push. Your job is to just be a cheerleader.<\/p>\n Now, at this point, you can look down and see your baby\u2019s head coming out of your wife\u2019s vagina. It\u2019s a trip, man. I\u2019ve heard that some men are grossed out by this and thus retain a repulsion long after birth to what once was a favorite area. That seems kind of weird to me\u2014I thought the whole thing was crazy, but cool.<\/p>\n Cord-cutter.<\/strong> You will probably get the option to cut the baby\u2019s cord and thus officially bring your baby into the world as a separate, free-wheeling human being.<\/p>\n Don\u2019t be alarmed at the baby\u2019s appearance.<\/strong> When your baby comes out, he may be wrinkly, covered in mayonnaise-like stuff, and have a cone-head. Don\u2019t worry\u2014he\u2019ll change dramatically in the next days and weeks, and start looking less like a weird, eyebrow-less Benjamin Button-like creature and more like a human baby.<\/p>\n Help your wife out with breastfeeding.<\/strong> If your wife is planning on breastfeeding, it\u2019s best for her to give the baby his first feeding within the hour after birth. So don\u2019t have all your friends and family rush in right after the baby is born; give your wife some time for a calm first feeding. We called our families a little while after the baby was born, let them know the news, and asked them not to come for an hour.<\/p>\n Despite its image as the most natural thing in the world, breastfeeding doesn\u2019t come completely naturally (it\u2019s about as natural as the first time you had sex). And sometimes it can be difficult\u2014and stressful–to get it going. Call me unmanly, but before Gus was born I read a couple of books about breastfeeding, and I was very hands-on in trying to get the positioning and latching right. Kate was much appreciative.<\/p>\n Bathe the baby.<\/strong> You will likely be invited to go to the nursery to give your baby his first bath.<\/p>\n Have the circumcision decision already made.<\/strong> We’re not going to discuss the different sides of this issue–we’ve already had that debate<\/a>. But by the time the baby is born, you should have done your research and made a decision. Don’t still be hemming and hawing about it at the hospital.<\/p>\n Help out with diaper changes.<\/strong> Most hospitals will let new parents keep their new baby in the room with them for most of the time. (They put Gus in this tub that sat on a cart. We called it the Gus Bucket.) It gives you a chance to hold your kid and watch in awe as she sleeps. It also means you get to change her diapers. Newborns go through a ton of diapers. In fact, they have a doctor mandated quota they’re supposed to meet to ensure they’re getting enough to eat. Your wife will probably be dog tired for a day, so roll up your sleeves and help with the diaper changing. Make sure to mark a notch for every diaper you change so you can tell the nurse. And if you and your wife need a baby break to get some sleep, you can always ask the nurses to take the baby to the nursery for a few hours.<\/p>\n Keep visitors at bay.<\/strong> If your wife isn’t in the mood to see visitors, or she is, but not a particular visitor, or if a visitor is overstaying her welcome, then your job is to kindly keep them away or show them the door. Just tell them that your wife has been through a lot and wants to rest right now. Don’t worry about hurting people’s feelings–your wife and baby are your top priority.<\/p>\n Make sure the information on the birth certificate is correct. <\/strong>A nurse will give you a sheet to fill out with information for the baby’s birth certificate. Write down everything with your best penmanship and double check that you spelled things right. You don’t want little Burt’s birth certificate to say “Butt.”<\/p>\n Have the car seat ready to go. <\/strong>Most hospitals require that you have a car seat installed before they’ll release your baby to you. I could write an entire post on car seats, but to keep things short, you’ll need a car seat designed for infants. They consist of two parts: 1) the carrier and 2) the base. Have the base properly installed in your car before you arrive at the hospital and bring the carrier to your wife’s room. Our hospital checked to see if little Gus was properly strapped in before giving us the okay to leave.<\/p>\n Escort your wife outside and then bring the car around.<\/strong> They’ll wheel mom and baby out of the hospital and to the curb. Go and get the car and pull it up to the exit. Put your newborn progeny into the car and help mom into her seat.<\/p>\n You’re on your own now.<\/strong> When you’re in the hospital, it’s still a surreal experience where doctors and nurses and friends and family are in and out. But once you’re in the car, and you shut the door–boy, it really hits you. You’ve got this baby for the rest of your life. Better start learning how to be a dad.<\/p>\n A Man’s Guide to Pregnancy Series:<\/strong> You\u2019ve taken care of your wife during the last nine months. And you\u2019ve made preparations for the baby\u2019s arrival. And now the moment has arrived at long last: it\u2019s time to bring your progeny into the world. Are you ready? ___________ For most of human history, the delivery of a baby was an activity strictly […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":19892,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[253,6,42285],"tags":[],"yst_prominent_words":[],"class_list":["post-19825","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-fatherhood","category-featured","category-relationships"],"featured_image_urls":{"large":"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2011\/08\/dad3-538x280.jpg","aom":"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2011\/08\/dad3-372x230.jpg","reactor-320":"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2011\/08\/dad3-320x253.jpg"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19825","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=19825"}],"version-history":[{"count":13,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19825\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":127759,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19825\/revisions\/127759"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/19892"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=19825"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=19825"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=19825"},{"taxonomy":"yst_prominent_words","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/yst_prominent_words?post=19825"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\n<\/em><\/p>\nBefore Birth: Pack a Baby Bug Out Bag<\/strong><\/h3>\n
\n
During Birth: Be Her Support
\n<\/strong><\/h3>\nAfter Birth<\/strong>: Start Things Off on the Right Foot<\/strong><\/h3>\n
\nHow to Take Care of a Pregnant Wife<\/a>
\nHow to Deliver a Baby in a Pinch<\/a>
\nGetting Ready for the Baby Bomb<\/a>
\nYour Progeny Enters the World<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"