{"id":182223,"date":"2024-05-14T09:51:33","date_gmt":"2024-05-14T14:51:33","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/?p=182223"},"modified":"2026-01-15T20:38:14","modified_gmt":"2026-01-16T02:38:14","slug":"recovering-your-personal-history-of-manhood","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/character\/manhood\/recovering-your-personal-history-of-manhood\/","title":{"rendered":"Recovering Your Personal History of Manhood"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-182224 aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2024\/05\/manliness.jpg\" alt=\"Elderly person holding a small, old photograph in front of an open photo album, recovering nostalgic memories.\" width=\"724\" height=\"483\" srcset=\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2024\/05\/manliness.jpg 724w, https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2024\/05\/manliness-320x213.jpg 320w, https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2024\/05\/manliness-640x427.jpg 640w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 724px) 100vw, 724px\" \/><\/p>\n<p><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">The other day, I was staring blankly at my bookshelf in my office while thinking about something related to the Art of Manliness.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">As I semi-zoned out, a book caught my eye:&nbsp;<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/amzn.to\/3WDL7Y2\"><em><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">Fire in the Belly<\/span><\/em><\/a><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;by Sam Keen.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">I hadn\u2019t cracked that book open in over a decade.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">When I first started AoM&nbsp;<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">back<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;in 2008, I&nbsp;<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">poured through<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;all the books about manhood and masculinity&nbsp;<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">that were out there<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">.<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;<\/span><em><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">Fire in the Belly&nbsp;<\/span><\/em><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">was one of them.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/featured\/the-13-books-that-have-taught-me-the-most-about-manhood-and-masculinity\/\"><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">(Here are the 13 best books about manhood and masculinity&nbsp;<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">that came out of<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;that study).<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n<p><em><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">Fire in the Belly&nbsp;<\/span><\/em><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">was published in 1991 and is part of the \u201cmythopoetic\u201d male literature that was popular&nbsp;<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">around that<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;time. Think Robert Bly&nbsp;<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">and&nbsp;<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/amzn.to\/3yiyVSC\"><em><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">Iron John<\/span><\/em><\/a><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;and<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;drum circles and the like.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">In the book, Keen argues that one of the problems facing modern men is that they lack, well, \u201cfire in the belly.\u201d It\u2019s a spiritedness that drives men to do great deeds.&nbsp;<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/featured\/got-thumos\/\"><em><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">Thumos<\/span><\/em><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">,<\/span><em><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;<\/span><\/em><\/a><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">in other words.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">After I noticed&nbsp;<\/span><em><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">Fire<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;in the&nbsp;<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">Belly<\/span><\/em><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;on my shelf, I took it down and thumbed through it, recollecting that I considered the book a mixed bag. Keen takes a compelling idea \u2014&nbsp;<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">fire<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;in the&nbsp;<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">belly<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;\u2014 and tries to make it jive with a New Age pony-tailed&nbsp;<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">nice<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;guy ethos. He wants men to have&nbsp;<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">spiritedness,<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\"> but in a non-threatening Age of Aquarius <\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">sort of<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;way.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">A lot of the mythopoetic men stuff is like that. It forwards some good concepts, but <\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">they\u2019re often framed<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;in a way that doesn\u2019t resonate with me&nbsp;<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">personally<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">. I\u2019m sure people have the same reaction to AoM. That\u2019s how the let\u2019s-talk-about-being-a-man cookie crumbles.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">One&nbsp;<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">section that I did think was interesting in<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;the book is&nbsp;<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">called<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;\u201cRecovering Your Personal History of Manhood.\u201d<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;In it, Keen lists&nbsp;<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">a series of<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\"> questions to help you reflect on and better understand your idea of manhood.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">Again, the content is a mixed bag. In typical mythopoetic male fashion, there are snicker- and eye-roll-inducing questions like: \u201cTrace the history of your penis. When did you first become aware that you had a dangling destiny?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">But<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;there are also some questions that I thought were useful, which I list below.<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">They\u2019ve given me some things to think about. They could be good conversation starters next time <\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">you\u2019re hanging<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;out with your&nbsp;<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">bros<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">. They might even be good to talk about with your teenage son.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">Collect photographs from your childhood and use them to tell a story of what you learned about being a man in your family of origin.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">What was your father\u2019s ideal of masculinity?<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">Who were your early heroes and role models?<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">What books, movies, or television programs presented you with images of men you imitated?<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">What&nbsp;<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">kind of<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;ceremonies or symbolic activities marked your passage from boyhood into manhood?&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">Who initiated you into manhood? Father, brother, uncle, grandfather, teachers, religious leaders, friends?<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">How, ideally, would you initiate your son into manhood? What would you say to him about the difficulties and joys of being a man? What advice would you give him?<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">What men do you most admire today? Despise?<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">What is&nbsp;<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">hardest<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">&nbsp;about being a man? What do you resent?<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">How competitive do you feel with other men?&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">Are you afraid men would despise or take advantage of you if they knew your hidden weaknesses?<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">What do you enjoy about being a man?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The other day, I was staring blankly at my bookshelf in my office while thinking about something related to the Art of Manliness. As I semi-zoned out, a book caught my eye:&nbsp;Fire in the Belly&nbsp;by Sam Keen.&nbsp; I hadn\u2019t cracked that book open in over a decade.&nbsp; When I first started AoM&nbsp;back&nbsp;in 2008, I&nbsp;poured through&nbsp;all [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":182224,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[502,42272],"tags":[],"yst_prominent_words":[],"class_list":["post-182223","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-character","category-manhood"],"featured_image_urls":{"large":"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2024\/05\/manliness-538x280.jpg","aom":"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2024\/05\/manliness-372x230.jpg","reactor-320":"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2024\/05\/manliness-320x213.jpg","reactor-640":"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2024\/05\/manliness-640x427.jpg"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/182223","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=182223"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/182223\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/182224"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=182223"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=182223"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=182223"},{"taxonomy":"yst_prominent_words","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/yst_prominent_words?post=182223"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}} 