{"id":178001,"date":"2023-08-01T14:23:57","date_gmt":"2023-08-01T19:23:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/?p=178001"},"modified":"2025-12-29T08:08:58","modified_gmt":"2025-12-29T14:08:58","slug":"how-to-manage-the-vampire-problem","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/character\/self-improvement\/how-to-manage-the-vampire-problem\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Manage the Vampire Problem"},"content":{"rendered":"

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Let’s say you have a chance to become a vampire, where you’d get the immortality and the supernatural powers, but you wouldn’t have to hurt anyone. Would you do it?<\/span><\/p>\n

It would be a hard decision to make. Not only will the transformation involve a radical change in your habits \u2014 moving from sleeping at night to sleeping during the day, from eating food to dining exclusively on blood \u2014 but once you become a vampire, there’s no going back to ordinary mortal life; you’re going to be a vampire, forever.<\/span><\/p>\n

Making the decision is not only a matter of figuring out if your current self would like being a vampire. Once you’re transformed into a vampire, you’ll become a different person. So, will <\/span>that<\/span><\/em> person like being a vampire?<\/span><\/p>\n

The philosopher L.A. Paul<\/a> compares this dilemma to that of deciding to become a parent. Once you have a child, even if you choose to have nothing to do with them, you’ll always be a parent. <\/span><\/p>\n

And, as in choosing to become a vampire, becoming a parent will change you. It’s not the person you are now who will experience being a parent, but that changed person. How will <\/span>he<\/span><\/em> like it? <\/span><\/p>\n

This is the “vampire problem”: you can’t know what a certain experience will be like before having the experience, and you can’t have the experience until you’ve decided to cross over into it.<\/span><\/p>\n

The vampire problem not only applies to the decision to become a parent, but to other big decisions like getting married, moving, and taking a new job \u2014 choices that, even if reversible, will require a high cost in money, time, energy, and\/or emotion to undo. <\/span><\/p>\n

There’s no ready way to overcome the vampire problem, but you can manage it the best you can with a few strategies:<\/span><\/p>\n

Talk to other people who’ve already become a vampire.<\/h2>\n

In Paul’s becoming-a-vampire hypothetical, you’ve got a bunch of friends who’ve already joined the undead, and they all tell you how great it is. But as Paul notes: “it seems awfully suspect to rely solely on the testimony of your vampire friends to make your choice, because, after all, they aren’t human anymore, so their preferences are the ones vampires have, not the ones humans have.”<\/span><\/p>\n

There are indeed limitations to getting input from other people when it comes to making a big decision. When people make choices, especially those with permanent consequences, they often avoid experiencing the cognitive dissonance that accompanies regret by affirming to themselves, “Yes, I made the right decision. Yes, this was definitely for the best.” Nevertheless, as Hal Herschfield noted in our podcast about coming to know your future self<\/a>, it can still be a useful exercise to talk to other people who’ve made the same decision you’re currently contemplating. This is especially true if you can find people to talk to who:<\/span><\/p>\n