{"id":128683,"date":"2020-09-30T10:49:39","date_gmt":"2020-09-30T15:49:39","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/?p=128683"},"modified":"2026-09-12T19:25:19","modified_gmt":"2026-09-13T00:25:19","slug":"podcast-648-lessons-in-building-rapport-from-experts-in-terrorist-interrogation","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/social\/social-skills\/podcast-648-lessons-in-building-rapport-from-experts-in-terrorist-interrogation\/","title":{"rendered":"Podcast #648: Lessons in Building Rapport from Experts in Terrorist Interrogation"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>What do you imagine when you imagine a terrorist being interrogated&nbsp;by an intelligence officer? The former getting roughed up? The latter yelling, banging his fists on the table, and demanding that the detainee talk?<\/p>\n<p>My guests today argue that using force in this way to get what you want isn&#8217;t effective when you&#8217;re dealing with a terrorist, or, for that matter, a teenager. Their names are Laurence and Emily Alison, and they&#8217;re a married pair of forensic psychologists, as well as the authors of&nbsp;<a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.com\/gp\/product\/B083FFXGSB\/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&amp;camp=1789&amp;creative=390957&amp;creativeASIN=B083FFXGSB&amp;linkCode=as2&amp;tag=stucosuccess&amp;linkId=FSXA3GZUT5SFDAZ4\"><em>Rapport: The Four Ways to Read People<\/em><\/a>. We begin our conversation with how through their extensive experience&nbsp;in training police, military, and security agencies like the FBI and CIA on how to conduct interrogations&nbsp;of criminals and terrorists, the Alisons discovered that literal and metaphorical browbeating was ineffective in inducing communication and cooperation, and that methods which built rapport were much more successful. We then discuss why building rapport in order to handle conflict, avoid arguments, and create connections is important not only in interrogation&nbsp;rooms but at work and at home. From there we dive into the four elements that make up this model of interpersonal communication, the last of which we demonstrate with some role play. We end our conversation with the idea of the &#8220;animal wheel,&#8221; in which different personality styles are represented by a mouse, lion, T-Rex, and monkey, and the importance of understanding&nbsp;your own interpersonal style and that of the person you&#8217;re engaging with, so you can predict how they&#8217;ll react, and adapt accordingly.&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>What do you imagine when you imagine a terrorist being interrogated&nbsp;by an intelligence officer? The former getting roughed up? The latter yelling, banging his fists on the table, and demanding that the detainee talk? My guests today argue that using force in this way to get what you want isn&#8217;t effective when you&#8217;re dealing with [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":28,"featured_media":195030,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[156,42379,42293],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-128683","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-podcast","category-social","category-social-skills"],"featured_image_urls":{"large":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/648-538x280.png","medium_large":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/648-768x432.png","aom":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/648-372x230.png","reactor-320":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/648-320x180.png","reactor-640":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/648-640x360.png"},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v28.4 (Yoast SEO v28.4) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>How to Build Rapport (Tips From Interrogation Experts) | Art of Manliness<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"What do you imagine when you imagine a terrorist being interrogated\u00a0by an intelligence officer? The former getting roughed up?\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/social\/social-skills\/podcast-648-lessons-in-building-rapport-from-experts-in-terrorist-interrogation\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Podcast #648: Lessons in Building Rapport from Experts in Terrorist Interrogation | The Art of Manliness\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"What do you imagine when you imagine a terrorist being interrogated\u00a0by an intelligence officer? The former getting roughed up?\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/social\/social-skills\/podcast-648-lessons-in-building-rapport-from-experts-in-terrorist-interrogation\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"The Art of Manliness\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"http:\/\/facebook.com\/artofmanliness\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2020-09-30T15:49:39+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2026-09-13T00:25:19+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/648.png\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1280\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"720\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/png\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"AoM Team\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@artofmanliness\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@artofmanliness\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"AoM Team\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"2 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/social\\\/social-skills\\\/podcast-648-lessons-in-building-rapport-from-experts-in-terrorist-interrogation\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/social\\\/social-skills\\\/podcast-648-lessons-in-building-rapport-from-experts-in-terrorist-interrogation\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"AoM Team\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/28ff38880a7c6995e23ac063aaaa81d4\"},\"headline\":\"Podcast #648: Lessons in Building Rapport from Experts in Terrorist Interrogation\",\"datePublished\":\"2020-09-30T15:49:39+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2026-09-13T00:25:19+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/social\\\/social-skills\\\/podcast-648-lessons-in-building-rapport-from-experts-in-terrorist-interrogation\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":277,\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/social\\\/social-skills\\\/podcast-648-lessons-in-building-rapport-from-experts-in-terrorist-interrogation\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/beta.artofmanliness.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2020\\\/09\\\/648.png\",\"articleSection\":[\"Podcast\",\"Social\",\"Social Skills\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"copyrightYear\":\"2020\",\"copyrightHolder\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/beta.artofmanliness.com\\\/#organization\"}},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/social\\\/social-skills\\\/podcast-648-lessons-in-building-rapport-from-experts-in-terrorist-interrogation\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/social\\\/social-skills\\\/podcast-648-lessons-in-building-rapport-from-experts-in-terrorist-interrogation\\\/\",\"name\":\"How to Build Rapport (Tips From Interrogation Experts) | Art of Manliness\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/social\\\/social-skills\\\/podcast-648-lessons-in-building-rapport-from-experts-in-terrorist-interrogation\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/social\\\/social-skills\\\/podcast-648-lessons-in-building-rapport-from-experts-in-terrorist-interrogation\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/beta.artofmanliness.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2020\\\/09\\\/648.png\",\"datePublished\":\"2020-09-30T15:49:39+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2026-09-13T00:25:19+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/28ff38880a7c6995e23ac063aaaa81d4\"},\"description\":\"What do you imagine when you imagine a terrorist being interrogated\u00a0by an intelligence officer? 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