{"id":12383,"date":"2010-10-04T22:36:22","date_gmt":"2010-10-05T03:36:22","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/artofmanliness.com\/?p=12383"},"modified":"2026-03-13T11:19:23","modified_gmt":"2026-03-13T16:19:23","slug":"the-art-of-the-dinner-date","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/relationships\/dating\/the-art-of-the-dinner-date\/","title":{"rendered":"The Art of the Dinner Date"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-12811 size-full\" title=\"dinner\" src=\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/\/2010\/10\/dinner.jpg\" alt=\"Waiter serving wine to women having dinner with husband.\" width=\"463\" height=\"511\" srcset=\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2010\/10\/dinner.jpg 463w, https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2010\/10\/dinner-320x353.jpg 320w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 463px) 100vw, 463px\" \/><\/p>\n<p><em>Editor&#8217;s note: This is a guest post from <a href=\"https:\/\/dappered.com\/\">Joe Weber.<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n<p>Eating is instinctual. And like a lot of instinctual things (ahem, the bedroom) men often go on autopilot when there\u2019s food in front of them. Now that\u2019s all fine and good when you\u2019re standing over the sink eating cereal by the handful and straight from the box, but if you\u2019re out with a woman who got all dressed up for this, it\u2019s time to change gears. The meal you\u2019re about to share isn\u2019t a necessary chore for survival. It should be an event. And your attention to a few key details will help make it one.<\/p>\n<p>Mastering the art of the dinner date isn\u2019t hard, and it\u2019s not all about <a href=\"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/character\/etiquette\/guide-dining-etiquette-table-manners\/\">proper etiquette<\/a> like which fork is for what (start at the outside, work your way in), or when you put your napkin on your lap (just do it when you sit down), although that certainly helps. Remember these simple rules before you head out to that fancy restaurant and she might even be excited to share a dessert with you.<\/p>\n<h3>1. She goes first. With everything.<\/h3>\n<p>And that goes from the moment you pick her up. She\u2019s the first to get in the car because you\u2019re holding the door for her. Same goes for walking into the restaurant. She\u2019s also the first to take her coat off because you\u2019re assisting there too, and the first to sit down at the table. She looks at the wine list first, and orders first (unless you\u2019re sharing a number of agreed upon dishes &#8212; then it becomes your job to order for the both of you). She also gets to pick the first piece of bread or whatever appetizer shows up before the entr\u00e9e. As men, we\u2019re selfish. We\u2019re used to fighting for that slice of pizza or the last beer amongst our equally selfish man friends. Show her that she is your priority. Not the wine, not your steak, not the cr\u00e8me brulee. She is.<\/p>\n<h3>2. Pace yourself.<\/h3>\n<p>In general, men eat at a faster clip than women. They\u2019re on a stroll. We\u2019re at a solid trot. Slow down. There\u2019s no deadline for you to finish your meal. Plus, if all you\u2019re doing is shoving food in your mouth, how are you going to be able to carry on a conversation? Which leads us to\u2026<\/p>\n<h3>3. Listen to her.<\/h3>\n<p>A great way to slow your eating down is <a href=\"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/articles\/how-to-listen-effectively\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">by listening to what your date has to say<\/a>. She\u2019s probably pretty interesting (or better yet, very interesting). Of course you don\u2019t want to over do-it and make her feel like she\u2019s delivering a lecture to a hall full of grad students, but pay attention to her, not the other guests in the restaurant, your oddball waiter, or any of the other distractions flying around the room.<\/p>\n<h3>4. Look the part. Wear a <a href=\"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/articles\/man-sports-jacket\/\">sports jacket<\/a> or <a href=\"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/articles\/man-blazer-jacket\/\">blazer<\/a>.<\/h3>\n<p>As long as it\u2019s not a total dump, you should be wearing a jacket. And get it tailored. Why? Because when you sit you take a major hit to your shape. Women like guys with shoulders. And when you\u2019re in a chair (or worse yet, some kind of booth), it\u2019s easy to look like you\u2019re collapsing in on yourself. A tailored, natural shoulder jacket will help you maintain that athletic V-shape. It doesn\u2019t have to be wool, and it shouldn&#8217;t have rigid shoulder pads. Even Old Navy sells casual cotton blazers for around fifty bucks that, when tailored, will do the job. Plus, the inside jacket pocket gives you an easily accessible place for a card case or the other supplies in your <a href=\"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/articles\/what-to-carry-on-a-first-date-the-gentlemans-arsenal\/\">gentleman&#8217;s arsenal<\/a>. So at the end of the meal, you\u2019ll get to effortlessly remove your chosen form of payment from your jacket instead of from under your rear.<\/p>\n<h3>4.5 And when it comes to the payment\u2026<\/h3>\n<p>You\u2019re paying. All of it.<\/p>\n<h3>5. Two drinks. Max.<\/h3>\n<p>Chances are you&#8217;ll be having a nice glass of wine. So enjoy it. If you want another? Go right ahead. But having a third drink over dinner almost guarantees that she won&#8217;t be up for another cocktail once the check comes. And even if she is, you won&#8217;t be at your best by then.<\/p>\n<p>See? Easy stuff. And unlike the specials and the orders the wait staff have to commit to memory, these shouldn\u2019t be too much to remember. Get all of these right and you might even land a second dinner date. Even if you spent half the meal with a piece of spinach stuck in your teeth.<\/p>\n<p>Remember, these rules apply even if you have a <a href=\"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/people\/relationships\/the-10-commandments-of-the-at-home-dinner-date\/\">dinner date at home<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>________________________________________________________________________<\/p>\n<p><em>Joe Weber is the Director and Editor of <\/em><a href=\"https:\/\/dappered.com\/\"><em><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">www.Dappered.com<\/span><\/em><\/a><em> where affordable style is the one and only focus. He believes that living right, living well, and looking good doesn\u2019t mean you should go broke in the process.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>What tips do you have for pulling off a successful dinner date? Share your advice with us in the comments!<\/strong><em><br \/>\n<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Editor&#8217;s note: This is a guest post from Joe Weber. Eating is instinctual. And like a lot of instinctual things (ahem, the bedroom) men often go on autopilot when there\u2019s food in front of them. Now that\u2019s all fine and good when you\u2019re standing over the sink eating cereal by the handful and straight from [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":13,"featured_media":12811,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[42377,6,42285],"tags":[42244],"yst_prominent_words":[],"class_list":["post-12383","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dating","category-featured","category-relationships","tag-dating"],"featured_image_urls":{"large":"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2010\/10\/dinner-463x280.jpg","aom":"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2010\/10\/dinner-372x230.jpg","reactor-320":"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2010\/10\/dinner-320x353.jpg"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12383","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/13"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=12383"}],"version-history":[{"count":16,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12383\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":141287,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12383\/revisions\/141287"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/12811"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=12383"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=12383"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=12383"},{"taxonomy":"yst_prominent_words","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/yst_prominent_words?post=12383"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}