{"id":100491,"date":"2019-01-01T14:04:27","date_gmt":"2019-01-01T20:04:27","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/?p=100491"},"modified":"2025-12-22T11:30:32","modified_gmt":"2025-12-22T17:30:32","slug":"motivation-over-discipline","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/featured\/motivation-over-discipline\/","title":{"rendered":"Motivation Over Discipline"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Vintage<\/a><\/p>\n

There\u2019s a popular maxim in personal development circles that goes: \u201cF**k motivation. It\u2019s fickle and unreliable and isn\u2019t worth your time. Better to cultivate discipline.\u201d<\/p>\n

Everywhere you look these days, people are exalting the sentiment behind this mantra; they\u2019re down on motivation and high on discipline. Your Instagram feed is probably full of \u201cinfluencers\u201d shouting at you to get disciplined. Discipline<\/em>, discipline<\/em>, discipline<\/em>!<\/p>\n

We used to beat the discipline drum ourselves. In fact, we were banging on about discipline<\/a> before it was cool, man!<\/p>\n

But in the past few years, I\u2019ve found myself changing my tune. Chalk it up to the greater self-awareness that (hopefully) comes with age, but I realized that while it felt satisfying in a fist-pumping, chest-thumping kind of way to attribute my good habits to discipline, it wasn\u2019t really <\/em>the operative force behind their execution.<\/p>\n

At the same time that I\u2019ve been questioning the role of discipline in my life, so has the scientific community. It was once thought that people who seem to have the most self-control — who rank themselves highly on this quality and have the positive life outcomes to back that assessment up — were simply better at exercising their willpower. But recent studies have shown this isn\u2019t the case;<\/a> in fact, as Vox writer Brian Resnick reports, \u201cThe people who said they excelled at self-control were hardly using it at all<\/strong>.\u201d<\/p>\n

As it turns out, people who seem to exhibit the most self-control aren\u2019t gritting their teeth and using discipline to resist temptations, but instead have minimized the number of temptations they experience in the first place. How? Because of the way they structure their environment and routines, and, because they actually enjoy<\/em> the habits they pursue.<\/p>\n

In other words, though observers on the outside, and even the individual himself, may think he does something because he\u2019s disciplined, he often actually does it because he\u2019s intrinsically motivated to do so.<\/p>\n

How do we so readily miss this fact? It happens like this:<\/p>\n

Let\u2019s say there\u2019s a guy who makes a habit of waking up at 4:00 in the morning. We find waking up this early extremely difficult. So, we assume this early riser experiences the same resistance we do, and yet manages to overcome it through greater discipline.<\/p>\n

Discipline, the ability to resist temptation and exercise willpower, carries all sorts of cultural and even ethical weight, owing to religion, the Puritans, the Protestant work ethic, etc. The possession of discipline is seen as a virtue; its lack, a moral failing.<\/p>\n

Thus, when we see that someone is able to wake up early, when we cannot, we not only chalk it up to greater discipline on their part, we equate this greater discipline with superiority of character, which turns their early rising habit into a moral imperative \u2013 something we should <\/em>do too.<\/p>\n

But it\u2019s possible to look at this example from a very different angle.<\/p>\n

Let\u2019s say there\u2019s a guy who makes a habit of waking up at 4:00 in the morning. He does so because he\u2019s biologically got a \u201cchronotype\u201d \u2013 a disposition towards a certain waking\/sleeping schedule<\/a> \u2013 that makes him naturally feel great, and function best, when waking up early in the morning.<\/p>\n

We, on the other hand, struggle with rising early, not because we\u2019re undisciplined, but because we have a chronotype that naturally predisposes us to go to bed and wake up later. We actually don\u2019t function best super early in the morning, and it\u2019s not even healthy for us to try to do so.<\/p>\n

In other words, while we assume that the early riser wakes up early because he\u2019s more disciplined — and the early riser himself is likely to chalk it up to discipline too, because that\u2019s the most flattering way to look at it — what\u2019s really happening is that the early riser\u2019s unique biology and personality dispose him to like a habit that others do not. He\u2019s not driven by discipline<\/em> to wake up early, he\u2019s motivated<\/em> to do so. But because we equate early rising with discipline, and discipline with moral character, we try to force ourselves into a mold that\u2019s not right for us.<\/p>\n

So the main reason we mistake motivation for discipline is that we miss the fact that some people\u2019s biology and personality predispose them to enjoy things that others find miserable.<\/p>\n

When the researcher Daniel F. Chambliss conducted a study<\/a> on the \u201cnature of excellence\u201d by examining what factors resulted in the stratification of competitive swimmers \u2013 why some became Olympians and others did not \u2013 he found that:<\/p>\n

\u201cAt the higher levels of competitive swimming, something like an inversion of attitude takes place. The very features of the sport which the \u201cC\u201d swimmer finds unpleasant, the top-level swimmer enjoys. What others see as boring\u2014swimming back and forth over a black line for two hours, say\u2014they find peaceful, even meditative, often challenging, or therapeutic. They enjoy hard practices, look forward to difficult competitions, try to set difficult goals. Coming into the 5.30 AM practices at Mission Viejo, many of the swimmers were lively, laughing, talking, enjoying themselves, perhaps appreciating the fact that most people would positively hate doing it. It is incorrect to believe that top athletes suffer great sacrifices to achieve their goals. Often, they don\u2019t see what they do as sacrificial at all. They like it.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Let me give you some examples of this phenomenon from my own life.<\/p>\n

For the last few years, I\u2019ve been dedicated to a coach-directed weightlifting program<\/a>. Every week I do taxing 60-90 minute workouts 4X a week. Over this time, I\u2019ve only missed a handful of workouts, mainly due to being really sick or traveling (though I\u2019ve hit most of my workouts even while on vacation). As a result, I can now bench 315 lbs, squat 456 lbs, and deadlift 605 lbs.<\/p>\n

Now, I could take to social media to crow about how disciplined I am. But it would be a lie. Discipline does not<\/em> drive me to work out. Rather, I work out because I like<\/em> it. I enjoy it. A lot<\/em>. It\u2019s one of my most favorite things in life.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s not even force of habit, either; it doesn\u2019t feel any easier, or more automated, to do my workouts now than when I first started. I did them at the beginning because I enjoyed them, and I do them now because I enjoy them.<\/p>\n

If you looked at my life from the outside, you might think, \u201cMan, Brett is so disciplined! I wish I could be like that.\u201d And yet you\u2019d have a completely false picture! I do my workouts consistently because I\u2019m motivated<\/em> to do them.<\/p>\n

I have to laugh when I see people posting on social media about how they\u2019re working out on Christmas or Thanksgiving, as if that makes them hard AF. You know why they\u2019re working out? Because they like<\/em> it.<\/p>\n

Same thing with work-work. I typically do some amount of work every day of the week. I work on weekends. I work on vacation. Sometimes I work on holidays. Sometimes I work long hours. Sometimes I pull all-nighters. To hear many entrepreneurial types tell it, I\u2019m working like this because I\u2019ve got grit, I\u2019ve got willpower; \u201cRise and grind, baby!\u201d<\/p>\n

Is that true? Do I work because I\u2019m disciplined?<\/p>\n

Nah. I do it because I like<\/em> working. I enjoy it. I feel <\/em>like doing it. I\u2019m motivated.<\/p>\n

If someone who doesn\u2019t like their job and doesn\u2019t like to work long hours, looked at my schedule they might think, \u201cWow, I can\u2019t imagine being that disciplined.\u201d But again, this would be an entirely distorted view. Said guy probably doesn\u2019t like to work long hours because he doesn\u2019t own his business and\/or he\u2019s not invested in the purpose behind his work. That doesn\u2019t necessarily mean he isn\u2019t as disciplined, he\u2019s just working under a different set of circumstances.<\/p>\n

In one of my favorite Jack London quotes<\/a>, he said:<\/p>\n

\u201cThe ultimate word is I Like. It lies beneath philosophy, and is twined about the heart of life. When philosophy has maundered ponderously for a month, telling the individual what he must do, the individual says, in an instant, \u201cI Like,\u201d and does something else, and philosophy goes glimmering. It is I Like that makes the drunkard drink and the martyr wear a hair shirt; that makes one man a reveller and another man an anchorite<\/a>; that makes one man pursue fame, another gold, another love, and another God. Philosophy is very often a man\u2019s way of explaining his own I LIKE.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

What London means is that people often come up with an explanation (whether it\u2019s the simple idea that they\u2019re disciplined or a whole philosophy) for why they do what they do after the fact<\/em>, when really, they do what they do because they like <\/em>it.<\/p>\n

And given that \u201cI like\u201d is \u201ctwined about the heart of life,\u201d you\u2019re ultimately not going to stick with anything that you don\u2019t truly enjoy \u2013 that you\u2019re not intrinsically motivated to pursue.<\/p>\n

Discipline = Self-Reliance<\/h3>\n

This is all to say that in many instances, what looks like discipline in someone else is just a matter of personal preference. If somebody wants to major in business, and we\u2019d hate doing that major, we don\u2019t think of ourselves as being less disciplined than them. If someone likes cilantro, and we don\u2019t, we don\u2019t think to ourselves, \u201cIf only I was more disciplined, I could eat more cilantro.\u201d We just think, \u201cDifferent strokes for different folks; I don\u2019t personally enjoy that.\u201d<\/p>\n

Yet we try to force ourselves into certain habits we think we should<\/em> do, even if they\u2019re not right for us.<\/p>\n

Now, I know what you\u2019re thinking, \u201cAren\u2019t there things we truly should be doing? Shouldn\u2019t we all exercise and eat right and try to be productive and stuff?\u201d<\/p>\n

I would certainly agree. But I would frame the typical discussion differently.<\/p>\n

You may like to lounge around, and play video games, and eat junk food, but this isn\u2019t what you should limit your life to. It is <\/em>a moral failing not to use your full potential to its utmost.<\/p>\n

But, it\u2019s not<\/em> a moral failing to choose to adopt one set of habits over another in order to achieve a life of virtue, excellence, and flourishing.  <\/p>\n

Winston Churchill had a unique daily routine<\/a>: he\u2019d stay up until 2 (and sometimes 3 or 4) in the morning, wake up at 8, and take a 2-hour nap at 3 PM each day. If he lived in the modern age, and posted a pic of his watch showing 2:00 AM, with a tagline about working late, he probably wouldn\u2019t get very many kudos; instead, people might tsk-tsk him about needing to get to bed. And he certainly wouldn\u2019t get many likes for showing his watch at 3:00 PM along with a \u201cNap time!\u201d caption. But why should this be, when Churchill\u2019s routine worked so well for him, allowing him to put in two \u201ccreative shifts\u201d a day (one earlier and one later), be incredibly productive, pen 44 highly praised books, and lead England through WWII?<\/p>\n

There are a few habits that are objectively right and wrong. But most are morally neutral. Instead of lending certain habits value only according to how difficult they feel, here\u2019s a better metric to use: what habits allow you<\/em> to access your greatest potential?<\/p>\n

There all kinds of ways you can approach the same habit; you can achieve the same end, through different means \u2013 a set of means you like<\/em><\/strong>.<\/p>\n

James Clear says this in Atomic Habits<\/em><\/a>:<\/p>\n

\u201cyou should build habits that work for your personality. People can get ripped working out like a bodybuilder, but if you prefer rock climbing or cycling or rowing, then shape your exercise habit around your interests. If your friend follows a low-carb diet but you find that low-fat works for you<\/a>, then more power to you. If you want to read more<\/a> don\u2019t be embarrassed if you prefer steamy romance novels over nonfiction. Read whatever fascinates you. You don\u2019t have to build habits everyone tells you to build. Choose the habit that bests suits you, not the one that is most popular.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Knowing that I need to exercise, I could flog myself to make running my fitness modality of choice; I could discipline myself to do it every day. But why would I do that when I can get in my regular exercise by doing something \u2013 lifting weights \u2013 that I actually like to do?<\/p>\n

You too, can find ways of eating, exercising, reading, working, and structuring your daily routine, that require less willpower, and that feel more enjoyable and intrinsically motivating.<\/p>\n

The path to finding those habits simply involves experimentation; Clear poses these questions as a way to direct your efforts: \u201cWhat feels like fun to [you], but work to others? . . . When are you enjoying yourself while other people are complaining? The work that hurts you less than it hurts others is the work you were made to do.\u201d<\/p>\n

It\u2019s not about avoiding difficult things, which would be a moral failing. It\u2019s about finding the hard things you nonetheless love. Just because something is hard doesn\u2019t mean it\u2019s right; when something is hard, and yet brings you joy, and unlocks your potential, then it\u2019s right for you<\/em>.<\/p>\n

That might sound like an easier standard to reach, as indeed you\u2019ll be choosing habits that feel more natural and intrinsically motivating. But it can still be a difficult task, for it involves ignoring what other people say you should<\/em> be doing and the feeling of guilt that can come from cultural expectations<\/a>. It\u2019s still hard in that you must choose habits for yourself, based on your own firsthand experiments, and stay your own unique course.<\/p>\n

Doing this takes work, so that here is what I think is a better way to define discipline: the ability to practice radical self-reliance<\/em><\/a>. <\/em><\/p>\n

The Obligatory Caveats<\/h3>\n

My message here is that what often looks like discipline in someone else is actually motivation; while it may be something you find difficult, he may enjoy it. If you\u2019re willpowering your way through life, you\u2019re probably pursuing the wrong goals, or going about their pursuit the wrong way.<\/p>\n

But when I say \u201cmotivation over discipline,\u201d I am definitely not saying \u201cmotivation without discipline.\u201d<\/strong> Discipline still most certainly plays a crucial role in forming habits and reaching goals.<\/p>\n

While I rarely need discipline to start my workouts, sometimes I need it when I\u2019m at the bottom of a squat and have to grind my way back up<\/a>. While I don\u2019t generally need discipline to get to work, sometimes I need it to power through a particularly tedious task.<\/p>\n

Discipline particularly comes in handy when you\u2019re trying to abstain<\/em> from something, rather than wanting to do something proactive.<\/p>\n

Few people like to suppress their temper, choose a salad over a burger, or quit smoking. Sometimes you do need to exercise pure willpower in contradiction to your feelings. Though even in these cases, there are strategies in which you can exercise discipline upfront \u2013 such as in the way you structure your environment \u2013 that reduce the need for the exercise of much discipline later on (tune into my podcast with Mr. Clear tomorrow for some very useful tips in this area). You can also often learn to like things you didn\u2019t like before; e.g., you may think you hate vegetables, but if, through discipline, you eat them regularly (and learn to prepare them well!) you may actually come to enjoy their taste. It\u2019s possible to change what you want to want<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Generally speaking, you shouldn\u2019t need too much discipline to pursue the basic building blocks of your life, but you will need it to go deeper and more intensely into them, and to refine their practice. So while you can significantly minimize your reliance on willpower, discipline will always need to be an active force in your life.<\/p>\n

My second caveat is this: when I talk about motivation, I\u2019m not speaking of a feeling that always burns like an overwhelming passion<\/strong>. It won\u2019t necessarily push you out the door. It won\u2019t always be a giddiness that bubbles over. Rather, it can manifest itself as a simple, quiet desire, a feeling of satisfaction you may need to intentionally tune into.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s not the case that \u201cwhen you do what you love, you\u2019ll never work a day in your life.\u201d Work will still feel like work, but work can be both hard and<\/em> pleasurable. <\/p>\n

Motivation Over Discipline<\/h3>\n

\u201cI am inclined to think that joy is the motor, the thing that keeps everything else going. Without joyous celebration to infuse the\u2026Disciplines, we will sooner or later abandon them. Joy produces energy. Joy makes us strong.\u201d –Richard J. Foster, Celebration of Discipline<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cDuty is a hard, mechanical process for making men do things that love would make easy. It is a poor understudy to love. It is not a high enough motive with which to inspire humanity. Duty is the body to which love is the soul. Love, in the divine alchemy of life, transmutes all duties into privileges, all responsibilities into joys.\u201d \u2013William George Jordan, The Kingship of Self-Control<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Discipline is necessary; duty is necessary, absolutely. But it\u2019s possible to feel<\/em> like doing what you want to do far more often than is realized.<\/p>\n

Perception is not always reality. Despite what the Discipline Industrial Complex™ might lead you to believe, you don\u2019t have to be superhumanly disciplined to reach your goals. You\u2019re not ultimately going to find success by white-knuckling your way through life. You\u2019ll never stick with things you don\u2019t, at some level, truly enjoy.<\/p>\n

There is almost nothing \u2013 from my work, to my routine, to my barbell training, to my marriage \u2013 that requires the active exercise of discipline. Instead, I do what I do, because I like it. It brings me pleasure and joy and satisfaction. I\u2019m motivated to do it.<\/p>\n

You can enjoy the magic of motivation too<\/a> if you experiment to find approaches to your habits, routines, and goals that are uniquely satisfying for you<\/em>. So you don\u2019t like exercising yet; how many of the hundreds of workout types and sports have you actually, really tried? A half dozen? Keep testing. Hate dieting? It\u2019s truly possible to find a way of eating that will make it easier for you to stay on track; there are people who genuinely like <\/em>intermittent fasting, low carbing, or the \u201cIf It Fits Your Macros plan<\/a>.\u201d This approach to life should even inform your faith; there are certain spiritual disciplines<\/a> that some people find very effective in accessing the transcendent, but which do little for others; find the practices that work for you.<\/p>\n

Stop feeling guilty if you hate waking up early, or loathe running, or don\u2019t think meditation does anything for you<\/a>. You should only feel guilty if you\u2019re not making the most of your talents and potential.<\/p>\n

Full human flourishing should<\/em> be your goal. How you get there is up to you.<\/p>\n

Find your own \u201cI LIKE.\u201d And let the opinions of others go glimmering.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

There\u2019s a popular maxim in personal development circles that goes: \u201cF**k motivation. It\u2019s fickle and unreliable and isn\u2019t worth your time. Better to cultivate discipline.\u201d Everywhere you look these days, people are exalting the sentiment behind this mantra; they\u2019re down on motivation and high on discipline. Your Instagram feed is probably full of \u201cinfluencers\u201d shouting […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":100552,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[502,6,42269],"tags":[],"yst_prominent_words":[],"class_list":["post-100491","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-character","category-featured","category-self-improvement"],"featured_image_urls":{"medium_large":"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2019\/01\/motivation-head-768x541.jpg","large":"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2019\/01\/motivation-head-538x280.jpg","aom":"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2019\/01\/motivation-head-372x230.jpg","reactor-320":"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2019\/01\/motivation-head-320x225.jpg","reactor-640":"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2019\/01\/motivation-head-640x451.jpg"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/100491","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=100491"}],"version-history":[{"count":13,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/100491\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":192072,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/100491\/revisions\/192072"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/100552"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=100491"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=100491"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=100491"},{"taxonomy":"yst_prominent_words","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beta.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/yst_prominent_words?post=100491"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}